As many of you know, this year didn’t start off the greatest. One of my most cherished cousins was murdered and if that wasn’t bad enough…the proceeding funeral events were almost as painful.
When I came back to Tampa, I spent at least two weeks in unimaginable pain and anguish. To cope, I kept telling myself, “Rock, you’re not that important. You’re not that important. You don’t matter. No one cares about you. It’s just you.”
That’s just a complex I have, where it’s more comfortable to stay nestled in the belief that I’m on my own. Here, you’d have the common response of, “But Rock. People do love you.” But what good is their love if they never express it? How do you benefit from their love and affection if they don’t show or demonstrate it?
For those who don’t know, Gynocentrism is the dominant or primary focus on women. It’s the opinion that we currently live in a society that panders and prioritizes the wants, feelings, and needs of women over the men, children, government, or even law and order.
Please understand, what I’m about to discuss is likely going to sound offensive. But before you pull out your pitchforks and torches…ask yourselves, what’s your reaction when you hear things like “the future is female” or “down with the patriarchy“? Just keep it in mind as I begin.
Here, I expound on the fourth of eight main points I’ve personally observed to help explain how one thing after another has sabotaged (ruined) dating for my generation. And at the end of each section, I’ll try my best to provide a solution because, I know…these sound like excuses. But I haven’t given up. I still have faith.
The Hook-Up Culture (Non-Monogamous Dating)
Tinder (Dating Apps)
Cat-Calling and False Accusations
Gynocentric Worship of Women
Brett Kavanaugh and Weaponizing Women
The Rise of the Manosphere
The Sisterhood
Leaving Christianity at the Door
In a Gynocentric society, the main goal is to encourage women to ascend to what is perceived to be “better positions,” positions that were traditionally held by men. Whether it’s in sports, leadership roles, politics, family, or the corporate boardroom, women are encouraged to be at the top.
Ladies! This is a huge one. This is a big reason why a lot of people will not get married or have the traditional families our parents and grandparents had. Because of the issues I’m about to discuss, a lot of Millennials are stuck in that perennial high school dance where the boys are on one side and the girls are on the other, but nobody is making a move to approach. Once upon a time, the onus was on men to go and approach the ladies. But because of these issues, the men simply are refusing to do this.
Here, I expound on the third of eight main points I’ve personally observed to help explain how one thing after another has sabotaged (ruined) my generation. And at the end of each section, I’ll try my best to provide a solution because, I know…these sound like excuses. But I haven’t given up. I still have faith.
Back in 2014, almost every media outlet and social forum was talking about that Cat-Calling video. It was the beginning of a campaign that eventually demonize what many believe to be “toxic” male behavior. It was the beginning of acceptance towards open misandry, which many felt was justified due to what they perceived as years of open and accepted misogyny. (because apparently two wrongs do make it right)
In the video, a woman walks through parts of New York and is filmed while a multitude of men are greeting her, complimenting her, wolf-whistling and trying to hit on her. Some were rude and disrespectful, absolutely. But not all of them. The problem is, all of it was deemed cat-calling and sparked a nationwide debate about the terrible harassment women have to face from men who behave like this.
As soon as I saw that video and the reaction it produced, I knew…My first thought was, “Well, damn. Now, how are we gonna talk to women?”
Five days before Christmas, I learned that my 26-year-old cousin was shot and killed. This person wasn’t just any cousin. She wasn’t just any family member. Ever since she was a baby, she was like a little sister to me. And apart from her surviving sister, I don’t think I ever loved anyone more than Autumn.
This one delves into the criticism many have voiced about the “Mary Sue” and Hollywood continually pushing the “strong female protagonists” in which most of those women act like men.
These opinions…don’t worry, they aren’t feelings that I’m super passionate about because there’s not much I can do about it. But I have held them for a long time. Even when I was in film school, my instructors used to tell me, “Rock, you have to play the game to win it.”
For those who don’t know, “Body Count” in modern terms refers to how many sexual partners you’ve had in the past. Recently, I’ve seen a lot of videos pop up from men and women debating how important or unimportant this issue is, but I haven’t seen anyone provide the perspective I’m about to give…so here goes.
From the women, what I’ve heard is that a woman’s Body Count A) is a very private issue and nobody’s business. B) If a man asks, then it must mean he’s insecure and C) It shouldn’t be an issue because if men can sleep around, then women can too. Check out this video below to hear it from their own mouths. (this is one of many videos I’ve seen)
From the Man’s Perspective…years ago, I learned about the notion of “Pair Bonding.” Pair Bonding relates to the emotional attachment a person has to someone else, the ability to stay connected to this other person for a monogamous relationship. Keep in mind, these are just theories.
Here’s some questions for you. Does God forgive Satan? Does Jesus Christ love Satan, just as he commanded us to love our enemies? These questions came to mind after a live debate I had with a woman at my gym.
The above were my immediate thoughts following a debate I had with an elderly woman (late 60s) at my gym. It wasn’t planned, but we struck it up and sat in the lobby to hash it out. I didn’t know much about her past prior to this conversation other than she claimed to be Christian. But she’s cool, a gym regular and past a certain age, so I’ve been able to have random chats with her without worrying about “making her feel uncomfortable”.
It began with her inquiring about my being a bachelor (a common topic of fascination). I gave her some details and she said, “Rock. Instead of looking for a wife, maybe you should look for a friend first? Just someone to get along with.”
I smiled and explained, “Yes ma’am. That’s the plan. When I say I’m looking for a wife, that’s just the end goal. It’s really my way of saying that I’m not part of today’s hook-up culture. A lot of my peers do want to get married, but first, they want to get laid. Whereas with me, marriage comes before sex.”
With this one, I want to make it clear that I’m not trying to hurt anyone’s feelings or bash anyone…but it’s something I’ve been in denial about for a long time.
Ever since I was a kid, I’ve been picked on, shamed, and made to feel bad for being attracted to white girls. And, shamed to say, I’ve struggled when it comes to finding the average black woman attractive. I’m not saying anyone’s ugly. I’m just saying that very often the attraction is not there. I wish it was, but it’s not. Brace yourself. I don’t hold anything back with this one.
The obvious answer is “Yes.” As others have pointed out, “The gospel is quite clear that there is no distinction between the saved prostitute and the person who grew up in church.” (see Galations 3:28) And yet, if someone does have a problem with accepting them…I think it’s important to understand why. Let’s talk about it.
Very often, what I’ve observed from some Christians is essentially this sentiment of, “God accepts them, so shut up. It’s not your place to have an opinion on it one way or the other. You’re no better than they are, so don’t get cocky. Everybody’s a sinner! Everybody sins! We’re all the same! You’re nothing special.”
Here, at Stage in the Sky, we aim to explore those feelings and dig deep as to why anyone would harbor animosity towards the reformed Christians in the first place. Maybe then, we can get over it, let go, and come to accept them?
This is a little embarrassing to admit because…as men, we’re told we have to be “masculine” and apparently everyone’s coming up with their own pre-conceived notions of what masculinity is…but if you know me, then you know honesty is forte.
This is about getting Likes or even Emojis for your work, posts, and social media. Essentially, it is “validation.” It’s cool to say things like, “I don’t NEED any validation”. Sure, sure.
The truth is…I don’t “NEED” it. But would I like it? Absolutely! Why does anyone post ANYTHING, if not to share and get some kind of reaction or validation back from the people who “follow” them. This isn’t a bad thing. We’re humans living in the age of technology. Once upon a time, we had local fairs and town squares. Now, we have social media.
Stage In The Sky 