This is inspired by a video I watched from a Christian Youtuber where she talks about “Bad Christian Advice For Singles” when it comes to dating, from a woman’s perspective. I listened and thought that was cool. So, this list is from a man’s perspective.
Because here’s the thing. I’ve seen comments and complaints from women who say that there’s not enough Christian men out there. Or “good men don’t want them because they’re “too Christian.” This list might give you some greater insight on all that. These are my Top 3 Things That May Cause Me to Lose Interest in a Woman Who Claims to be Christian.
1. They Don’t Take Their Looks Seriously and Believe You Shouldn’t Either
It’s what’s on the inside that counts, right?
I have compassion with this one so I’m going to try and be delicate. If you’re a good Christian woman endeavoring to do what’s good in God’s eyes, why should you be concerned with your beauty? If you’re doing what’s good in God’s eyes and men aren’t attracted to you, then clearly those men must not love God, right?
I’ll Have My Fun Now and Get Religious Later…Would that work?
In this essay, I answer that question and describe the difficulties Christians face when it comes to resisting temptation, while trying to find that elusive good Christian mate if you’re not part of a congregation.
I’ll Have Fun Now and Get Religious Later… – A Theocratic Essay By Rock Tennie
When I was a kid, I must have been thirteen when I looked around the congregation and saw that it was mostly filled with older people. Aside from my brothers, about two other families had kids our age. There was hardly anyone in their 20s and 30s.
My parents became religious Jehovah’s Witnesses when I was eleven, effectively ending the fun things we used to enjoy, like celebrating birthdays and holidays. So, it was only a matter of time before I asked them.
“How about this? How about let me enjoy life and have all the fun I want while I’m still young. And then when I get older, that’s when I’ll get super religious and dedicate my life to God?”
My mom said, “It doesn’t work like that. Because you have the knowledge now. You can’t claim ignorance.”
At the time, I felt this was very cruel of them. I didn’t ask for that knowledge. It was thrust upon me. So when I went to school and saw my peers being able to join sports teams and hang out with each other after school, peers who could talk to each other over the phone and get together for fun events on the weekends…part of me felt jealous and left out, like an alien amongst humans.
All my life, I believed that Jesus Christ was the son of God. Two years ago, I was told something different. I was told that Jesus was not only the son of God the way I think of a father and his son…but that Jesus Christ was God himself in the flesh, that Jesus Christ and God are the same person.
In this essay…I’m going to break down my pursuit of the truth. And mind you, everything I’m about to reveal is just my interpretation of the scriptures. I could very well be wrong. However, as a Christian, I believe it’s my responsibility to learn and make a decision about what I believe is the truth. Thus, when I stand before God, it won’t be with this indifferent attitude of “…well, I heard this and that…But I’m not sure what I believe.”
On that note…before you begin, I encourage you to pray. Remember, it’s by the grace of God that we receive our understanding.
Just to give you a little background about who I am. I’m a black 33-year-old Christian Conservative born and raised here in the States. I’ve never been to any Christian College or Theocratic School. I’m not a member of any church or congregation. I have no denomination. That isn’t to slight organized religions. I know God loves assemblies. I’m just a man who decided to pick up the Bible and read it cover to cover. To learn for myself why things are the way they are? How did it come to this? Is there any hope? What should I do? What is right? What is wrong?
So why am I questioning who Jesus Christ really was?
Because of a Lutheran.
Haha, so…at the age of 30 (in 2017) and having already read the Bible once in its entirety, I made up my mind to find a wife, a woman who also endeavors to do what’s good in God’s eyes. That’s easier said than done in today’s woke secular culture, unless you’re part of a congregation. I am not.
I attend the Jehovah’s Witnesses Memorial every year, but I couldn’t attend their meetings on a regular basis because it reminded me of the turmoil of my youth. They study these articles in magazines called “Watchtowers,” where a lot of the substance is about how to be a better Jehovah Witness. Since I’m not a Witness, I felt like an outsider. Alone, despite surrounded by others. Continue Reading
Ever since I was a kid…it was very difficult for me to ignore the truth.
“Rock did you have a good time?”
No.
“Rock, are you happy to see us?”
No.
“Rock, you should focus on the positives!”
I can do that…but that’s not what you asked…Sounds mean and heartless, doesn’t it. But those were literal answers I gave to grownups when I was just a child. Back before I had any concept of tact or sugarcoating…telling people what they want to hear.
If it’s the truth and you asked for it, I think a piece of me really does die inside when I have to come up with some pleasant positive response while skirting about the honest truth. And worse…if you go about doing this all your life just to make others feel good when the responses you give are far from the truth, do they really know who you are? Do they really know the truth about you? Or is it, that so many of us don’t want people to know the truth about us?
When you die and they describe you to others at the funeral…wouldn’t it piss you off to hear how far off from the truth they are? Last year, an associate passed away and I experienced such a case. I’d hear others describe him as such a happy person and they couldn’t understand why he died. That may be the truth as they knew it…but I saw a different truth. One that left me with little questions when I heard he had taken his own life.
During my sophomore year in high school, I truly was a pathological liar. In an upcoming essay about Sigmas, you’ll get a better grasp of why I was like this, but I can tell you there’s a lot of credence in the phrase, “it takes one to know one.” I was a pathological liar, thus, I understand what it means to lie and why people do it.
“What do you mean you were a pathological liar? I thought you were dropping truth bombs as a child? So what happened?”Continue Reading
I’m not attracted to unnecessary drama and conflict. If you project the image of someone who has an attitude or constantly confrontational, you’re going to attract people of that nature. It’s as simple as that. And believe it or not, there are people who would prefer the thrilling emotional roller coaster ride of an unstable relationship, as opposed to a stable (predictable) peaceful one. Even if they don’t realize it.
You attract the energy you put out. I know this sounds nice and catchy, but I don’t think people really understand what it means. This here essay is inspired by some of the most beautiful women I see on Instagram and Youtube videos like the one below…They aren’t celebrities. Just people blessed with beauty. And yet the attitude they project make them so unappealing in the eyes of men like me.
“It’s just a performance, Rock. These girls aren’t like this in real life.”
You’re talking to an artist. With every decision we make in creating our art, there’s always a reason why. There’s always a motive. If you think I’m overthinking it, I can just as easily say you haven’t thought about it enough.
The energy they’re putting out is sex. Like all they want to do is get sex. And if you put out that energy, guess what kind of men you’re going to get. Men who only want sex. And then they wonder why the men they’re attracting have a tendency to sleep around on them.
Growing up, some of the most unpleasant experiences I had with the opposite sex came in the heat of an argument where there was usually a lot of yelling, accusations, and name calling. There was a lot of attitude, malice, and resentment. Feelings were hurt. I’d usually walk away and want nothing more to do with the person. Of course, tempers would simmer and we’d usually talk it out and come to some kind of resolution…but as a sane rational man, I didn’t enjoy those heated confrontations. They weren’t pleasant.
So why do some women think displaying such attitudes will attract a good man? Who told them that this is what men want?
Put it this way, if you posted photos of identical twin sisters…which do you think a good man would go for, the photo of the twin who’s projecting a fierce “sexy” attitude…or the identical twin who’s smiling like she’s happy to see you? Which would you choose? I’m sorry, let me reiterate. Which would you be more likely to spend the rest of your life with?
And if you’re the type of guy who’d be like, “I’d still hit the one with the lion. She looks like fun.” Be real. Ask yourself, “which are you more likely to approach?” Especially in today’s MeToo society.
This is an easy one we all should know but probably haven’t stopped to consider…myself included until just now. Recently, articles came out about Christians getting upset with an upcoming movie portraying a Gay Jesus that would be aired on Netflix.
The Reason Why Christians Get So Upset by Disrespectful Movies and TV Shows By Rock Kitaro Date December 22, 2019
Click if You Just Want to Listen to Me Reading the Essay
Leftists and even some Conservatives have hit back at the Christian community telling them, “If you don’t like it, don’t watch it.” And “Oh, I thought you guys were okay with freedom of speech!”
For a while, this had me stumped. Because, as an artist, I’m all for free speech. And I too follow the logic of if you don’t like it, don’t watch it. But at the same time, the portrayal of Jesus Christ as gay does upset me. Why? Well, let me illustrate.
How would you feel if you were going to die, your death warrant was signed and sealed, your life was scheduled to come to an end forever? And then, your brother or your sister, your mother or your father stepped up and offered to sacrifice themselves so that you might have a chance to live in everlasting life.
And then, when it came time for them to sacrifice their lives for you…it wasn’t clean. It wasn’t quick or painless. They spit on your mother. A mob of people beat your sister. Your father was chained to a rock and scourged with a whip that struck flesh from his back with each strike. They dragged your brother out, forcing him to carry his own cross and drove nails into the palm of his hand. For hours, he languished in pain and agony with the weight of his body tearing into his impaled ankles and hands until his life expired.
How would you feel if a loved one did all of this for you, only for someone to disrespect and belittle their sacrifice? To joke about it. To joke about the person who saved your life and gave you the chance to live forever, to see our loved ones again. Continue Reading
Last month, I read an article where men were blamed for the decline of the marriage rate. Aside from the plethora of reasons raised over the past five years about how horrible we men are, this one had me taken aback…The complaint of the day is that “Men are not economically attractive.”
Godly Men Don’t Care About Money – A Theocratic Essay By Rock Kitaro Date – October 14th, 2019
And I know what you’re thinking…
“There are rich, Godly men out here. I’m Christian, and I care about money. I’m God-fearing and I care about money, so what’s good?”
Don’t worry. I’m going to get into it. We live in a society. We all need money to live comfortably. However, I encourage you to consider Proverbs 30: 8-9, and then watch this video to see what I’m talking about.
It really does make me smirk because I get it. If you’re a woman, you have every right to seek men of equal or greater economic value. Everyone has a right to their sexual preference. Go for it. Why not?
Just one question though…if you’re one of those women who were taught to put so much emphasis on your education to get that high paying job, then you battled it out for years to attain said job, and now you’re out here making that high five-figure or even a six-figure salary…what are the odds of you actually finding someone of equal or greater economic value…who also happens to be single, of good moral fortitude, and interested in someone like you? I say that with affection, I assure you. I’ve had to ask myself the same questions, given my own circumstances.
“Yeah? Well, maybe men simply need to get right. Men need to step it up.”
“Why should they?”
Honestly, if a man is loving life with his 40k salary, why should he “step it up” to make himself have equal or greater value just because someone else seems to care more about having a higher salary than him? Even when I was 27, my ex would constantly be on me to apply for other jobs in my company because they paid more. And when I’d tell her, “No, I love what I’m doing. I don’t think I’d be happy with those role.” she’d seem disappointed.
“Well, Rock. Maybe she’s thinking about a family and knows that you’ll need as much money as you can to raise them!“
That’s a valid argument. Truly, it is. I don’t blame her for making those kind suggestions when it came to my career growth. In fact, my own parents will tell you that it’s been my philosophy to work as hard as I could in my 20s to create a stable financial foundation for my future family…
But a lots changed in the past five years. My priorities have shifted. I picked up the Bible and cultivated a strong relationship with God. I learned the Truth that I feel compelled to share with you. But first things first…I got to get you thinking. If you’re not used to thinking, it’s alright. Take your time. There’s nothing to be ashamed of when you’ve been told your whole life what to think and how to think it. Baby steps. You’re reading the words of a rebel, the path I walk is narrow.
…
Have you ever stopped to consider why you’re doing anything that you’re doing? What’s the point? What are you getting in return? Why put yourself through such an ordeal? For what? I get that sometimes you have to do what you don’t want to do in order to succeed, but is it worth your peace and happiness? You only get 60-80 years and that’s it. We’re only tenants on this earth. When we die, we take nothing with us, except the deeds by which we will all be judged.
What I think it boils down to, is that women like the ones addressed in that video, are disappointed not because men are “poorer,” but because men don’t value the same things the women value. This should make sense because men and women are different, but alas…this is the reality the mainstream media is trying so hard to deny. And if they’re wrong about this…what else are they wrong about? If they’re wrong, then who’s right? Continue Reading
One of the coolest thing about reading the Gospels every night, is that it’s gotten to the point where I can literally say, “There was something about what Jesus said last night…” I just went for a walk on break and I smiled. Because his words were on my mind. And I love thinking about it!
It’s like having the most dependable friend in the world right here with me. Someone I can talk to and hear from every day. He’ll never abandon me. He’ll never betray me. He’s there when I’m down and out and he’s there in my triumph. Some one I can talk to, unburden myself, ask for guidance, and then receive it by reading the scriptures.
Honestly, I think that’s one of the coolest things about the Bible. My older brother said it best years ago. When I told him that I prayed every day. He told me, “It’s great that you talk to God, but don’t you want to hear what he has to say to you? Wouldn’t it be cool if he talked to you too?”
Last night, in Matthew Chapter 15, Jesus talked about it’s not what enters the mouth that defiles you, but what comes out of it, the product of the heart. I know I have all kinds of twisted and messed up thoughts. So I wondered if that meant my heart was no good. But in thinking about what he said and how he dealt with that Canaanite woman in the same chapter, I’ve come to the conclusion that…the fact that I have such impulses and horrid thoughts, but don’t act on them, that I restrain myself…it shows that clearly there’s more goodness in my heart than wickedness.
And all I can do is continue to try and get better. So that, doing what’s good to the best of my abilities gets easier and easier. #jesus#bible
Half of all marriages end in divorce, they say. Are they justified? Who decides? Jesus had some thoughts on the subject. It wasn’t until recently that I finally understood. lol, we humans think we’re so slick.
The Truth About Adultery and Divorce – A Theocratic Essay By Rock Kitaro Sept 1st 2019
MIKA – HAPPY ENDING
Remember who is the father of the lie. Keep in mind that lies are enticing because sometimes they tell us what we want to hear. The truth can be painful because it exposes what some of us wish to hide. But to God…there is no hiding. Even if you lie to others, even if you lie to yourself, He can see your deepest intent, he knows what’s in your heart. There is no fooling him.
So when you divorce your spouse because “you’re just not happy anymore” or because “he’s not the same person you once knew” or because “you don’t deserve to live the rest of your life in an abusive relationship.”…it’s in your best interest to acknowledge that God knows the truth. These are all convenient excuses our modern society accepts and lauds for ending marriages.
But how does God feel about it? What did Jesus say about it? Do you want to know? Or are you just content with how humans view it…especially if they’re telling you what you want to hear?
During Jesus’s famous Sermon on the Mount, he told the people, “Everyone divorcing his wife, except on account of sexual immorality, makes her a subject for adultery. And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.” (Matt. 5:32)
What? I’ve read that scripture so many times, and I confess, I never truly understood it. How is it that a man who marries a divorced woman, commits adultery? How does a husband subject his wife to adultery by divorcing her? It didn’t make sense. Continue Reading
A discussion of complacency…how people fear the PC culture more than they do God. I explain what it means to Fear God and what it means to love him at the same time.
The King of Kings – A Study of Malachi By Rock Kitaro August 16th 2019
A popular saying these days among young people these days is, “I’m a king! I’m a queen!”
“Beyonce is the Queen”
“I’m looking for my King!”
“If you want to be a king you gotta treat her like a queen!”
I’m seeing it more and more, particularly amongst the Black Community when it comes to men and women searching for their potential spouse. I’ll make this little essay short and sweet and get straight to the point.
We need to stop with all this self-love nonsense. We need to stop with the complacency when it comes to just “accepting” any and everything. And we need to start fearing the one true God as the King of Kings. None of us are kings. None of us are queens. If you submit yourself to Jesus Christ’s teachings, you should do as you’re commanded and pick up the cross to follow him, seeking first the Kingdom of Heaven, storing up your treasures in heaven, not on earth. Even Jesus came to serve, not be served.
The Book of Malachi is one of the most potent Bible Books in the Bible and I can’t believe how much I glossed over it the first time I read it two years ago. Just to give you a bit of background info, Malachi was a prophet after the Jewish captivity in Babylon. The Jewish people were given permission to rebuild the temple that had been destroyed, but even after the near hundred years of the temple’s completion, the people had become complacent when it came to serving and fearing the one true God.
And this seems to be an epidemic when it comes to humankind. One of our biggest flaws, is our forgetfulness and complacency. In times of peace, we become soft and laxed when it comes to our commitments and holding true to such virtues like obedience, honor and duty. And yet, when catastrophe strikes, then all the sudden it’s, “WHERE IS GOD! HOW COULD GOD ALLOW THIS!?”
We’ve done this to ourselves and it’s making me sick to my stomach that people never take responsibility. I hate that so much. Even when it comes to my peers or even potential mates. When I hear about what has happened in their lives, I only respect them when they take ownership. The moment I hear, it’s somebody else’s fault, my respect dwindles.
Because here’s the blunt truth, regardless what your pastor told you, regardless what the world’s telling you. The Bible is chalk full of scriptures that fall along the lines of, “Draw close to Jehovah and he will draw close to you.”
The problem we have as humans is that we want to claim the blessings of God without accepting the conditions of it. I’ve heard teachings that, because Jesus died for our sins, we’re all forgiven regardless of what we do so long as we “accept that Jesus is our Lord and Savior.” And most recently, from the friggin Bachelorette, we have Hannah Brown talking about, “I’ve had sex and Jesus loves me.”
