God

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Is God Really Hearing My Prayers?

Posted by Rock Kitaro on March 10, 2019
Posted in: About the Author, Food for Thought, religion. Tagged: , , , , , , . 2 Comments

Is God Really Hearing My Prayers?
By Rock Kitaro
Date – March 8, 2019

billy-graham-praying

Every once in a while, I fall into brief bouts of depression, short spells that last two or three days. It’s usually triggered whenever circumstances force me to slow down and I have no choice, or rather it gradually becomes apparent that I’m missing out on a lot.

What most people do for “fun”…isn’t fun for me. I can’t help but see how different I am from my peers…and all of it makes me sad and lonely.

Like I said…this doesn’t happen often. But as long as I live in a society, I believe its human nature to compare yourself to others every once in a while. It can’t be helped.

During a recent conversation with my mother, a strong believer of Christ, she asked me if I trusted in God with my whole heart.

Without hesitation, I said yes. 100%. Understandably, she had some reason to doubt me. In the Gospels, I recall Jesus mentioning a number of times how… “Happy is the man who trusts in Him…”

And of course, if I’m not happy it does beg the question if am I really trusting in God? It led me to an interesting thought in which I may have surprised myself more than I surprised my mother. I asked her:

“Was Jesus happy? While he was here on earth, was he happy in the general sense? Sure the Bible mentions that there were times when he was happy. But also times when he was indignant. Or what about Jeremiah? Or Isaiah? Or Elijah? Or the Twelve Apostles or the Apostle Paul? Were these happy individuals? Happy to be doing God’s will, sure. But other than that…”

This requires deep thought and for the topic of this essay, I don’t want to dwell too much on answering that. Because, as humans, I believe everyone runs the gauntlet of emotions in which we experience happiness, sadness, triumph, victory and defeat. But overall, in the big picture, it is food for thought to consider whether men of God who sought to serve him and do what was good in his eye, were happy…living on this earth, amongst human societies.

And the reason why these thoughts prevail…As a man who’s read the Bible in its entirety, cover to cover, I believe it’s incumbent upon me to serve as a good example to others. God is my salvation, my rock, my hope. But if I was a non-believer, or someone who was on the fence about wanting to learn the true character of God, and they saw me looking down and depressed on a chronic level…it doesn’t exactly make for good advertisement.

Meaning, why would someone want to read the Bible in its entirety and strive to put God first in their lives…if they’re witnessing the complete abysmal state of someone else who’s doing that? Thus, I feel responsible. I have to fight back that which is bringing me down and remember God’s grace. But I need his help. I can’t do it alone. And so I pray…

I pray everyday when I leave my home for the strength, patience, and wisdom to deal with whatever may come. I pray when I’m faced with a challenge. I pray before I leave work, thanking him for getting me through it. I pray before I hit the boxing gym, asking that he help keep my body intact. And when I come home, after a hard day’s work and near depleted from working out…I sit in the same spot on my couch and bow my head, truly reflecting on the day, what I’ve done, how far I’ve come and where I want to be.

I beg his forgiveness for I know I have sinned. I know my weakness, my propensity to desire badness towards those who have crossed me. I know my weakness to sometimes lust after women who are no good for me. So I pray and beg him to continue to be with me. I pray that he blesses me with the strength to continue on, to hold my head up and keep the faith. I pray that his will be done. And I pray that I forever continue to strive and seek first the kingdom of heaven.

If I pray so fervently on a daily basis and claim to trust God 100%…how could I ever face bouts of depression? Doesn’t sound right, does it?

And last week, I watched a documentary about the evangelist, Billy Graham. This was an awesome man who lived to be 99 years old. And I confess, I wept as I watched him. From what I learned, he truly did so much to spread the Gospel to hundreds of millions throughout the world. And he seemed happy doing it. He appeared to have a loving wife, loyal children, and productive grandchildren. This was a man of God, in my opinion, who truly put God first in his life and from what I saw, he seemed happy.

But still. It was a documentary. It’s kind of like Facebook, or reunions where people share the highlight of their lives…while keeping the lowlights, the dark chapters tucked in the closet. I think that’s the case with me. It’s not like I’m miserable. I laugh and I smile a lot. But I confess…it’s tough.

Thus, my mother hit me with a question that left me dumbstruck for about five seconds. She asked… “Do you think God is hearing your prayers?”

As she continued to follow up with skepticism about whether or not I’m doing what’s good in God’s eyes, I took a moment to really evaluate the question. “Do I think God is hearing my prayers?”

And it made me smile, the conclusion I reached. I told her:

“Honestly, I don’t think there’s ever been a time in which I ever doubted God was listening to my prayer. I know he is. It’s part of that absolute trust and faith that I have in him.”

And I meant it. In my heart, I await God’s judgment. If I were to walk out of my home tomorrow and saw Jesus Christ returning on the clouds of glory to come and rid wickedness from this earth as it’s foretold…I wouldn’t dread it. I wouldn’t fear or run or scream or try to hide. I’ve dreamt of it. I know without a shred of doubt that I’d smile with open arms. Whether God thinks I’m deserving of life or death, punishment or grace, I submit to his judgment. Honestly, I can’t wait. Sometimes when I pray for the day, I weep thinking of how glorious the day would be.

I know that makes me sound somewhat like a fanatic…but if you knew the history I know about this world, what has happened, what is still going on all across the globe…I truly believe that you too would welcome the return of Jesus Christ with the utmost relief, like a flowing oasis in the middle of a scorching desert.

But of course…as a true intellectual, my belief and theories are just that without the pillars of evidence to support my conclusion. So…I went to the source, keeping in mind the question, “Does God hear my prayers?”

In Lamentations 3:8 it says “though i cry out for help, God shuts out my prayer.” This was Jeremiah speaking his wailings in the time of the Babylonian siege of Jerusalem. For those who don’t know…circa 600BC, Jerusalem was a very immoral place. For generations, God’s own people turned their backs on him by worshiping false gods, indulging in immorality and vice, and even sacrificed their children in the service of these false Gods. Time and time again, God sent prophets to warn them, to warn their kings to do the right thing. But Judah did not listen.

Thus…God passed judgment on his own people. And even still, in his infinite grace, God used Jeremiah to warn the people of the sentence he passed. Jeremiah told the kings and the people that a hammer, an army from the north would sweep through and destroy them. God chose King Nebuchadnezzar and the army of Babylon as the instrument of his wrath to discipline his people. Not to wipe them out completely. But to punish them severely for their iniquities.

In the book of Jeremiah, God repeatedly tells Jeremiah not to pray for the unrepentant ones of Judah because of their perpetual sin. And in Lamentations, he confirms that at the very least…if God does not hear it, he does indeed “shut out the prayer”.

So… If God doesn’t answer your prayer, is that an indication that he doesn’t hear your prayer? Or that he has “shut out your prayers”?

I don’t believe that’s the case. We have to understand that everything God does, he doesn’t have to do it at all. He owes us nothing. But he gives us according to his grace, love, and generosity. God answers prayers according to his will and at the time of his choosing. In Jeremiah there were instances where he prayed on behalf of the people and it took ten days for God to answer. In the case of Joseph who was falsely accused of sexual misconduct (sound familiar?) and imprisoned, even after he correctly interpreted the dreams by God’s grace, it would take him another three years before he was released.

Then there’s the example of Job. Job is probably the ultimate example of how bad things happen in which we have no explanation and will probably never learn the reasons why. Job never knew why God allowed Satan to strip him of his possessions and destroy his loved ones. And Job’s friends did their utmost with convincing arguments to say Job was guilty of all the afflictions. He wasn’t. If was due to a conversation God had with Satan, and really by God’s good grace and wisdom that he chose Job to have this happen to, knowing Job would not curse him and instead maintained faith as a shining example for billions who would go through trials and tribulations in the future.

That’s why I have faith. I ask God for his blessing every day as well as the strength and patience to wait. If I feel like I’ve been waiting an eternity, I have to remind myself that it just might be that God in his infinite wisdom is preparing me mentally and physically with experiences to handle that which I have asked for…like preparing me to be a man who would be a loving husband and devoted father.

Or it could be that he’s preparing me for another mission that I’m not currently ready to embark on. It may also well be that God is using me as an example for others, to test me, refine me, and punish me should I dare slip up and turn my back on his Word.

No matter what, we must never falter in doing our part by continuing to pray and have faith. Trust in him and if you lose focus or start to doubt, remember the examples he provided for us in the Bible. You think you have it worse than Job? Or Jonah? Or Jeremiah? Trust in Jehovah, our heavenly father. Always.

In conclusion, does God hear your prayers? Yes. Does he answer or deliver on all of them? That’s up to Him. But for your part, it should be irrelevant in your faith and trust in Him. And striving to put God first in your life certainly couldn’t hurt your chances.

And feel free to check out my essay of Job and Human Suffering. I think it might help improve one’s perspective. Thanks for reading!

The Truth About Human Suffering – Powerful Lessons from the Book of Job

Posted by Rock Kitaro on May 20, 2018
Posted in: About the Author, Food for Thought, History Lesson, religion. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , . 2 Comments

By: Rock Kitaro
Date: May 20, 2018

Job-Suffering

Greetings my friends,

In light of recent (the last few years) events, I felt compelled to share this. Here, you will read a conversation that took place between God and Satan and how it affected the life of Job.

1. There are matters going on in heaven with God that believers know nothing about, yet it affects our lives.

2. Even the best effort at explaining the issue can be useless without the scriptures.

3. God’s People do suffer. Bad things happen all the time to good people, thus, one cannot judge a person’s spirituality by his painful circumstances, or his success.

4. Even though God seems far away, perseverance in faith is a most noble virtue since God is good and one can safely leave his life in His hands.

5. The believer in the midst of suffering should not abandon God, but draw near to Him so out of fellowship, comfort can come.

6. Suffering may be intense, but it will ultimately end for the righteous and God will bless abundantly.

These are the six fundamental truths about the Book of Job taken from the MacArthur Study Bible. Last week I started re-reading Job and then last Friday that tragic school shooting from Santa Fe, Texas happened. I know it’s becoming somewhat of a twisted tradition for people to use such tragedies to either push their agenda, virtue signal, or grandstand, making it all about them instead of the victims or the surviving family members.

Even in reading this, my words, here and now, you may choose to see that I’m doing the same. Dare I ask, please curb all cynicism if for just a moment. Notice how I didn’t even post a picture of the shooting as click-bait or a close-up of a grief-stricken loved one just to provoke an emotional reaction from you. If by the end of this you think I’m nothing but a peddler trying to cash in on someone’s tragedy to look good in someone’s eyes (I’m a loner), I accept that as a failure on my part for not driving home the message, the main focus of this post.

Let’s start with whom Job was.

Job was a man blameless and upright who fear God and turned away from evil. He was considered well known in the land of Uz, this is east of Canaan, somewhere north of the Arabian desert. The time or era of his existence was considered around the same or possibly before Abraham uprooted and left for the land flowing with milk and honey. So, you have to think, it was sometime after the great flood. No doubt generations after Noah’s sons repopulated the earth and even after the people were dispersed following their attempt to build the tower of Babel.

Job’s wealth was measured not by gold or money. Not by land. But by his livestock. The scriptures say he owned some 7,000 sheep, 3,000 camels, 500 yoke of oxen, and 500 female donkeys. He must have had a great amount of servants working for him to maintain such wealth.

On top of that, Job’s true blessings were in the form of his ten grown children. He had seven sons and three daughters and loved them immensely. He loved them so much that he’d offer burnt sacrifices to God on their behalf just on the mere chance that his children had sinned even in their hearts. This shows how considerate and thoughtful he was. Job was a good father.

In terms of popularity through the eyes of most humans, Job would be like the Bill Gates of today’s time. Famous, rich, and perceivably without a care in the world.

In the first chapter of the Book of Job, God held council with his angels in heaven. Satan, the Adversary, was among them. In verse 8, God says to Satan, “Have you considered my servant Job, that there is none like him on earth, a blameless and upright man, who fears God and turns away from evil?”

Beginning in verse 9, Satan answered, “Does Job fear God for no reason? Have you not put a hedge around him and his house and all that he has, on every side? You have blessed the work of his hands and his possessions have increased in the land. But stretch out your hand and touch all that he has and he will curse you to your face.”

God replied in verse 12, “Behold, all that he has is in your hand. Only against him do not stretch out your hand.”

Here we see that God gave Satan permission to inflict Job with hardships. And no doubt, haughty and proud following his success of corrupting Adam and Eve, Satan set out full of confidence that he could sway Job to curse God to his face.

Before we go into the “why,” lets consider what happened. Mind you, this is just the first chapter of over forty.

In this very first chapter of Job, after holding conference with God, Satan stripped Job of his livestock via death through marauders, robbers, and fire from the sky. That’s over 11,000 animals under Job’s possession suddenly gone. The scriptures say that this happened all in one day. That’s right. In verses 13-19, the scriptures tell us that only four servants rushed in to tell him of the tragedy, one right after the other.

And worse, was when Job learned that while his children were visiting his oldest son’s house, a great wind came and toppled the four corners of the house to kill them all. All ten of his children. Dead.

In a single day, Job lost nearly everything. He was rich, considered successful in the eyes of the world. Considered moral, flawless, and upright by all who knew him. Yet he, even he, was forced into suffering. In verse 20, it says he “tore at his robe and shaved his head and fell to the ground.”

But did he curse God? Did he wave his fists at the sky and scream “WHHHYYY!!!!”

The scriptures tell us in verse 21 that Job said, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb and naked shall I return. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.”

In verse 22 it says, “In all this Job did not sin or charge God with wrong.”

All of this happens in the very first chapter of the Book of Job.

I can’t wait to continue reading because I know what happens and need ever to be reminded. Further into the Book of Job, after he is stricken with leprosy and cast out by society, three of his so-called friends approach him and try to get him abandon his faith in God. And dude…I’m telling you their arguments are convincing. When I read them, if you’d like, I can post the tactics they use. Because I think a lot of their tactics are still being used today by Atheists and Apostates alike.

But going back to that question of “why” for a moment. I have to point out something all true believers should keep in mind. This is a hard pill to swallow, but I don’t think it is if your heart isn’t corrupted by this society.

God does not owe us anything.

Just take a moment and really consider that. I know I did when I first read the statement. For, like you, I too see God as our loving heavenly father. And as we all know, fathers do owe their children something. But still…God is the Grand Creator. One of my favorite lines in the Book of Job later on is when he tells Job in 38:4 “Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth?”

God does not owe us anything.

Not an apology. Not a reason. Not an explanation. He doesn’t owe us safety or security. He doesn’t owe us love or friendship. He doesn’t need our love nor our obedience. He requires them. But doesn’t need it. In the Old Testament there were so many times where God was about ready to just wipe out the ungrateful Israelites who yet grumbled despite having witnessed with their own two eyes the supernatural events, his awesome power manifested in the form of dark clouds and fire. And if it wasn’t for Moses pleading on their behalf, reminding him of the Abrahamic Covenant…

God does not owe us anything.

And if you really take those words to heart. Consider what that means, I think you’ll come to have a greater understanding and an appreciation for God’s grace, generosity, and mercy. Everything he does for us is what he chooses to do. Not because he owes us or we’re entitled to it.

Two great examples of this is the sacrifice of Jesus Christ for our sins, which he didn’t have to do. And I think, most relatable to the theme of Job, is the gift of the Bible. We have the knowledge, the answers that people thousands of years ago did not have. It was easier for them to be led astray because they didn’t have the internet or Google where they could fact-check. Or in the case of us Christians, a source where it gives us the truth to guard against false prophets and tactics of wicked manipulation.

Meanwhile, Job had absolutely no idea why he was made to suffer such heartbreak, such tragedy, such hardships. He had no clue about Satan’s endeavor to get him to curse God. Even when God talks to Job in the later chapters, he offers Job explanation. Yet, by Job’s example he teaches us what we should all do. And this is the main message the Book of Job drives home.

“In the end, the lesson learned was that one may never know the specific reason for his suffering; but one must trust in Sovereign God. That is the real answer to suffering.” – MacArthur Study Bible.

Bad things will continue to happen until the end of this wicked system of things. Jesus will return and wash away all wickedness from this Earth. If you don’t believe this then it’s understandable, the frustration and confusion, the anger and outrage, the questions of “WHEN WILL IT END?” or “WHY DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING?” will forever persist.

And as we all know, suffering for Job does end. And God blesses him abundantly with more than he lost and ten more children after the ordeal was complete.

But also, keep in mind that even though Job received great blessings after the ordeal, even still, this isn’t owed to us. Mind you, the main reason why Satan thought to challenge God when it came to Job’s devotion was because Satan believed it was due to a question we should all ask ourselves in the depths of our hearts. “Do we serve God with pure motives or are we only in it as long as the blessings flow?”

IF GOD REALLY LOVED US, HE WOULDN’T ALLOW US TO SUFFER!!!

IF GOD EXISTED, HE WOULDN’T ALLOW GOOD PEOPLE TO SUFFER!!!

GOD DOESN’T EXIST BECAUSE IF HE DID, HE WOULD HAVE ANSWERED MY PRAYERS!!!

About three years ago, I used to hear those statements all the time by associates and people around the world from the forums I’d contribute to. I knew from my Christian foundation why bad things were happening and why they would continue to happen. But that knowledge was inherited or passed down to me. Meaning, it’s just what I was told. I never took the time to actually read what the Bible has to say on such matters. Thus, when I hear the emotional outcry following some national disaster or tragedy, I’d find my own doubts bubbling to surface, my faith slipping on thin ice.

That’s when I picked up the Bible. I opened the very first page and started to read. I read one to three chapters a night depending on the length and after two years, I finished reading the whole book. I can’t tell you how much it’s changed my life for good. However, I confess, one perceived side-effect about knowing the truth is that you can be seen as somewhat callous when bad things happen. You’re not shocked or terribly surprised by what’s happening.

And while you see others around you in their grief, their demands for change, their finger-pointing and a human need for justice…you can’t help but feel thankful that you know the truth. Our Grand Creator. The God of Armies. The God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jehovah. Our heavenly father. Turn to him. Put your faith in him. Seek first the Kingdom of Heaven always.

Rock Kitaro – Walk in Jesus Christ’s Footsteps, they say…

Posted by Rock Kitaro on April 10, 2015
Posted in: About the Author, Food for Thought, History Lesson. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . 1 Comment

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The following are raw unedited thoughts from yours truly. Read at your own discretion.

Sometimes I wonder…vainly of course. if Jesus Christ was like me in his twenties. Bearing the pressures of expectancies of family, toiling and committing himself to his craft that was carpentry and fish…all the while resisting destructive impulses and fighting off the waves of crashing temptation of fornication and immorality and drunkenness, and covetousness and acts of violent revenge against perpetual offenders.

Why did it take him till the age of 30 to get baptized? Could it be that he himself understood himself, and recognized that he knew he was not ready to commit himself to that path. I wonder if he too, saw the hypocrisy of other clergy-men and proselytizers who led double lives and promised himself that he wouldn’t become one of them.

I wonder if he too, saw the flaws of boxing himself into one religion when he knew better than most that the way others were worshiping Jehovah, while it may have been earnest and in good intentions, were overall daunting and diminishing to the souls, the different hearts that needed a different approach when it came to them approaching and praying to God.

I say different hearts, because more and more, I’m beginning to believe that not all hearts are the same. Is there a study of hearts? Like the study of psychology, and I realize that my use of “hearts” if figurative and thus, vague and intangible and essentially non-existant. But it’s the feeling we all have, and not everyone feels the same. And I think that’s okay.

For instance, my life is saturated with men and women who don’t know I exist, but they are in my world because I have learned of them, either through news articles or random research. Even those who do know I exist, often and understandably presume that I hate them just because they annoy me. But it’s not hate. My annoyance with them is based on the lives they lead,  and I care because I love them.

The love I bear for them, is incomprehensible by many of my peers because they either don’t believe it or can’t understand it. I weep for families I’ve never had the pleasure to make their acquaintance. My heart is girdled in chains when I hear of victims. My skin peels and crackles into embers when I hear of children sold into slavery, their lives ruined and tainted by the selfishness of adults who care nothing or see nothing beyond a certain point like spiders.

The more I see…the more my heart cries and begs for wickedness to be washed away sooner than later. I sometimes lament being born at all and then slap myself for thinking I’m any better than they who I cry for. Why has such a walking contradiction such as myself been allowed to exist? The strength I continually prayed for has been given to me, and with it I keep walking. But for how long? I wonder, if that’s why I crave purity and innocence for my company.

“Surround yourself with like-minded individuals” they say…

I won’t go so far as to say that’s impossible. But I will say that I’m tired of looking. I am the lone wolf who talks to everyone. I judge everyone as everyone judges everyone. To call me judgmental is to declare yourself judgmental. There’s nothing wrong with it. To accept oneself, the essence of romanticism and inner peace and happiness and an honest unbridled and naked self to present yourself in your prayers…what’s the point of it all if we continue to deny what’s right in front of us. The obvious truths we ignore for the sake of…fitting in?

By Rock Kitaro

April 10th 2015

The Bridge to Clearwater Beach – My Own Personal Kingdom

Posted by Rock Kitaro on July 14, 2013
Posted in: About the Author. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , . Leave a comment
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“Fly” Korean song by Geeks –

When you think of Tampa Bay, what generally comes to mind? When most people think of South Florida, they usually think of Sea World, Disneyland, and the exotic club scenes of Miami. I think you may be hard-pressed to find many talking about the city of Tampa. If you did, you’d probably hear of the hundreds of strip clubs or the sports teams that constantly make a national impact in the various leagues.

But living in Tampa, Florida for eight years now…I’ve never done any of that. I’ve never been to a strip club, taken in the sights of the theme parks or even care to visit Miami. Does that make me lame or dull? Maybe… I grin… I don’t think so. I’m still relatively young, and ambitiously, I’ll tell you that compared to what I’ve dreamed, the worlds and complicated characters I’ve created…They make Miami those aforementioned attractions seem like the black-and-white pictures you’ll find of undeveloped new lands from the Great Depression era.

This isn’t to slight anyone who enjoys such attractions…only to differentiate that not everyone needs such sights to stimulate the imagination. For a romanticist such as myself, all I need is that which nature provides. The open sky that seems limitless, the perpetual motion of the oceans that shows an endless abundance of energy…and the wind…The wind that allows me to fly every time I close my eyes. It’s amazing.

This little memoir is a piece I’ve written to elaborate on how this bridge has served as my own Fortress of Solitude. Since 2005, I’ve found myself embarking to this destination every time I feel lost or have strayed off course. And every time I’ve climbed up that bridge, I’ve carried with me chains of animosity and suicidal thoughts caused by heavy self-loathing. And every time I walk back down…I feel resurrected as an entirely new individual. I can’t blame those around me for not keeping up…I never stay the same and this is why.

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