Stage In The Sky

The Real Reasons Why Christians Hate being Judged 

In 2024…we need to let go of this fear of being called “Judgmental.” It’s making Christians look bad. It’s giving Atheists and Agnostics good reasons to reject Christ. And it’s enabling those who think they’re Christians to let go of their fear of disobeying God. 

Seriously, before I get to this video, just think for a moment about the damage we’re causing. Those who are quick to call Christians judgmental think they’re doing a good service by putting the “self-righteous” ones in their place, but is that where their focus should be? 

Points Discussed: 

• How Equality and Acceptance Created Your Ego 
• Should the Church Be More Accepting? 
• The Shaming Tactic of Calling others Judgmental 
• Why You Need Christians Who Are Holier than Thou 

The self-righteous may be overzealous, overbearing, and annoying, but if they believe in Christ and strive to live by Christ’s standards, they are saved. 

Now ask yourself, of the Christians who are so quick to tell you “hey, don’t judge!”…how many of those same Christians are quick to call out the Christians who are clearly indulging in immoral lifestyles and sinful behavior? They’d rather silence you but say nothing about the ones engaging in the hook-up culture, doing drugs, getting drunk, attending events that celebrate things like Pride. Don’t you find that a bit odd? 

I think I know why this is happening. So badly, they want to be loved and accepted by humans and this world so much, that in the spiritual battle, they’ll cross lines and attack God to prove their loyalty to the world. 

Even if you want to stand on the logic of, “Well, I don’t want to offend people or hurt their feelings” by calling out what the Bible says on the matter, you’re still doing more harm than good because by saying you “accept them” you’re encouraging them as they march headlong off a cliff when you should be working to steer them to salvation! 

Here, people like to throw out how Jesus ate with sinners. They use this to demonstrate how Christ was accepting of everyone. They’re wrong. In Matthew 9:10-17, Jesus uses the illustration of a physician (doctor) seeking out the sick. The healthy ones don’t need a doctor to get better. The sick ones do.  

Thus, he sought out the sinners not to accept their behavior and lifestyles, but to help them get better. So if you call yourself a follower of Christ, are you hanging out with people who engage in sinful lifestyles to encourage them to get better? 

“But, Rock. We’re all sinners.” 

True, but you know what I’m talking about. There’s sinning as in, I made a mistake and I’m going to do my best to do that again. And then there are sinful lifestyles where the person not only embraces their sinful actions, but they celebrate it, continue to indulge in it, and see nothing wrong with it.

“Well, maybe the reason why people don’t like hanging around Christians like you is because they want to go somewhere where they feel accepted. It doesn’t feel good to be with someone who acts like they don’t accept you, as if they don’t measure up to some standard you think they should live by. That’s why these Christians don’t like the ones who act like they’re “holier than thou.” 

Those are good points. Let’s talk about it. 

How Equality and Acceptance Created Your Ego – 

First off…I need you to be aware of how much this world has indoctrinated my generation to believe in and prioritize two things. Acceptance and Equality. By Acceptance, we’re talking about this need to be welcomed and loved for who you are and what you do, no matter who you are and what you do.  

I’m not saying people have never wanted to be accepted. I am saying, it’s relatively new that people feel entitled to it. Because that infringes on everyone else’s personal constitution, their freedom to choose whether or not they like who you are. 

And by Equality, we’re not talking about fairness or justice…we’re talking about the same. As I wrote in my Simone Biles essay, people are obsessed with this notion that we’re all the same and equals, when the truth is, we’re not. Simone Biles is a gold medalist. She was judged to be better than all she went up against. She was not their equal. 

Even modernized Christians try to prioritize this in things like our roles as men and women, husband and wives. They care so much about being equal. They hate the idea of being inferior. And they’ve been led to believe that being a follower or submissive is the inferior role. 

Matthew 6:24-26 teaches that you can’t serve two masters. You cannot serve God and the World. You will either hate the one and love the other. The World teaches Equality and Acceptance. The Bible, believe it or not, discriminates and tells us the Kingdom of Heaven will not have certain behaviors and lifestyles. 

And here’s where the World has tricked you, here’s where your own principles fail you. Let’s say you stand on the grounds of Tolerance and Acceptance. Let’s say, you stand by your beliefs that everyone should be who they are and still be loved and accepted no matter what. 

Do you keep that same energy when you encounter racists? Or misogynists? Or those who tend to vote for a particular party? Do you accept it when old men in their 60s date women in their 20s?  

Or…could it be that you pick and choose which lifestyles you accept based on how you feel? (Proverbs 3:5) And when you have an entire generation doing this, it leaves them vulnerable to the influence of popular opinion. You’ve left yourself wide open to worship humans instead of God. 

I think the reason why so many are more comfortable worshiping humans than God is because, plainly put, they love their sin. The world is telling you what you want to hear. If you’ve been influenced to prioritize money, sex, fame, and fun…while they Bible preaches modesty, celibacy, and repentance, it makes sense why Jesus said you’ll love one master and hate the other.

My friends, I don’t tell you all this for gloom and doom. I just hate that you’re being lied to. As Christians, it’s our duty to reach out and try to pull you into the lifeboats of salvation.

I personally know a woman who transitioned to a man over the course of a decade. When I first met her in 2011, she was beautiful. She may have already been a lesbian back then, but she was clearly a woman.  

As the years went by and the LGBTQ movement gained steamed, she was emboldened by the preachings of the world to cast off the person God made her to be. And I saw…I witnessed as those around her encouraged and prodded her on. I saw as the company and corporations emboldened her, waving a 50-foot pride flag from one of the walkways.

In 2016, she ran into me in the hallway. It had been a while since we last talked one on one, so she asked me how I’d been. I told her, “Well…I’ve changed. I’ve read the entire Bible from cover to cover and I believe in it. I strive to put God first and committed my life as a Christian.”  

It was honestly a bit awkward because I knew her lifestyle and it brought me no pleasure to proclaim my allegiance to a belief that opposed hers. That’s the truth. I cared about this woman. I didn’t want to offend her or make her sad, so I understand the Christians who are afraid to come off as “judgmental”. I didn’t want her walking away thinking I didn’t love her as a person. I did. 

And it was out of love that I told her the truth. She responded with, “Well, I’m Christian too, so that’s great.”  

And when she said that, I didn’t think. “No, you’re not really a Christian.” I thought to myself, “That’s great. You must be on your Christian journey and you still some got some ways to go.” 

“Well, Rock. We all got some ways to go!” 

No. Stop…stop right there. This is what I’m talking about. This need to think we’re all the same, we’re all on the same level, and we all got the same problems. We are different and some people need more help than others. When you try to treat everyone the same, you neglect those who need help the most.  

If you have two kids, one’s making B’s and the other’s failing with F’s, who would you logically pour more attention to?  

This Christian lesbian…since that conversation in the hallway back in 2016, she went on to marry her girlfriend. She invited almost half the department but not me, despite knowing me the longest. In the last 3 years she started her transition. And just this past week, a friend told me that they ran into her and sure enough, she removed her breasts, now has a beard and a mustache and looks like a man. 

“Well, Rock, it’s her decision.”  

Am I not allowed to feel sad? Or disappointed?  

“See! It’s that right there. That’s why we hate you Christians who think you’re holier than thou. Because you refuse to accept that it’s her decision. You refuse to…” 

Enough…We all want what’s best for our friends and family. And again, while you’re so quick to chastise me for my very reasonable disappointment, do you have any words for her? Or is it just, “You go girl? Live your best life?” 

Christ told us that the greatest commandment, the NUMBER ONE commandment we should be striving for is to love Jehovah your god with your whole heart, soul, and mind. If God sees something as an abomination, and you tell people it’s okay and encourage them to keep doing that thing…are you obeying this commandment? 

Again, I get it! It’s not great to hurt people’s feelings. It feels good to be loved and accepted. You’re reading the words of someone who’s almost always alone. I cherish every single moment when I’m with people who love and accept me because it doesn’t happen every day, and the last thing I want to do is say something that will push them away.

If I reacted with, “Wow, friend. That’s so cool that you’re a lesbian and about to get married!” I probably would’ve been invited to her wedding, cavorting with friends, and co-workers and having a good time as normal people do. But I didn’t. 

I remember last year, standing next to a close family member when she heard one of our cousins claim to be bi-sexual. And when the cousin said this, my family member praised her in the heat of the moment, saying, “Oh, that’s cool!”  

Nope. It’s not cool. I’m sure the family member didn’t really think it was cool either, but she, like so many are conditioned to want to make people feel good, that we end up enabling them. And because I’m not, they look at me as if I’m holier than thou.  

Another example, just recently, one of my bosses bragged about the late Kevin Samuels and the woman he was sleeping with before he died. He showed me a picture of the woman and said, “Dang! Kevin did good.” 

And my reaction was this uneasy smile as I said, “Yeah, but he shouldn’t have been doing that. You know…they weren’t married.”

My boss said, “So? Oh, wait. Yeah, you’re right.” 

I brought up that example to illustrate that I’m not just talking crap. I’m not criticizing others while failing to live up to the same standard. It isn’t easy. Satan’s made it extremely difficult. But by your actions, you demonstrate your faith.

And no, this doesn’t mean I call out every bad thing I see. When I heard my cousin was bi-sexual, I didn’t scold her right there on the spot. I can still smile and be happy to see her without celebrating her lifestyle. But if she asks, if she wants to draw close to me…with love, I’ll tell her what I really think.

SHOULD THE CHURCH BE MORE ACCEPTING? 

To the above pic, a male commenter said, “God sees our filth and doesn’t just accept us, but died for our acceptance. We need humility to stop thinking we’re somehow better than unbelievers, who we would be if not for Christ.” 

Here’s the truth ladies and gentlemen…We are better than nonbelievers. If you don’t want to die, believers in Christ are better than those who don’t believe.

I’m done feeling ashamed or sorry for that because it’s not helping anyone. All it does is appease the egos of nonbelievers and lukewarm Christians who have gotten comfortable with their sinful lifestyles. 

I responded to his comment with: “What’s better, being on a sinking ship, or being saved on one of the lifeboats destined to port? I get what you’re saying, but more and more, I’m beginning to believe those who reject Christ because they don’t feel accepted have an ego problem in which they think they’re entitled to acceptance. 

“Christ welcomes us all, but not as we are. We have to repent. Some people don’t know this. And when we tell them, they feel unaccepted. That’s their ego and pride refusing to humble themselves.” 

Even here, there are some Christians who believe in the concept that all you have to do is say you believe in Christ and you’re saved no matter what you do or how often you sin (no doubt, drawing from Romans 10:9).  

That is a very comfortable and convenient belief that inspires no fear or reverence, no urgency or importance. It implies that there are no consequences for your bad behavior. This is wrong. 

If Christ tells us to repent, to go and sin no more and his Apostles outline a succinct list of sinful behaviors that have no place in the Kingdom of Heaven, if you believe as you say you do, would you still indulge in these behaviors? 

“Well, maybe people don’t want to engage in their sinful behavior but it’s hard. And God knows our heart. He can see that we’re trying but we all fall short. That’s the beautiful thing about Christ is that he keeps forgiving us and loving us no matter how many times we fall short.” 

You make some good points there. So, allow me to illustrate two types of people here. 

The first is the woman who washed Jesus’ feet with her hair. This is in Luke 7: 36-50. According to the Scriptures, this was during a dinner at the Pharisee Simon’s house. Apparently, this woman was well known by everyone for her immorality, maybe a prostitute. 

The woman knew that Jesus would be here, so she came to wash his feet with perfume. And she was so ashamed of what she had done that she started crying. The Bible says she washed his feet with her tears and her hair. This woman humbled herself. She demonstrated great sorrow and regret. A penitent spirit.  

Compare that this second woman. A modern Christian named Hannah Brown from the Bachelorette. During the show, she was called out by another Christian for her sexual immorality. Her response was not like the woman with Jesus. She boasted, “Well I’ve had sex and Jesus loves me.”  

Even in the follow-up interview (see above) she doesn’t talk about how she needs to get better or acknowledge that she was wrong to indulge in sexual immorality. She’s so focused on protecting her ego. Not wanting to be judged. Promoting this message of you can do whatever you want. 

“Well, how would you feel if someone judged you like that on live TV?” 

The “live TV” part doesn’t matter because she had the above follow-up interview and displayed no remorse or contrition. She was used by the mainstream media to promote the narrative that we shouldn’t judge or shame anyone. It’s one of the reasons why so many worldly “Christians” hate the ones who do. 

“No, Rock. When you’re judged like that, it’s an attack on her faith. She had every right to get emotional and defensive to protect the relationship she has with God, which was called into question.” 

I understand that. Truly I do. Last year, I was judged by other Christians for my stance on Baptism. Like, this was a real event, a real dinner I went to where two older Christians judged me for not believing in Baptism the same way they do. I listened to their opinions, disagreed, and was able to articulate why I believed they were wrong, using the Scriptures to back it up.  

The problem I have with Hannah Brown and Christians like her is that they use emotion and the fact that they’re offended as a deflection tactic to take the spotlight off of her sexual immorality and need for repentance.  

“But Rock, that’s nobody’s business.” 

I disagree. If you put on the badge of calling yourself a Christian, you must live by that standard. Especially if you have a public platform. People are watching. You have the ability to uplift and inspire thousands to be better. Or you can corrupt them towards a more ungodly lifestyle. 

“But Rock! The Bible says don’t judge!” 

Alright, let’s get into it. 

The Shaming Tactic of Calling others Judgmental

First off…let’s go ahead and address a major fallacy of those who like to stand on “Judge Not Lest Ye Be Judged!” These kinds of Christians act like if they don’t judge anyone…they won’t be judged by God based on how they chose to live or what they’ve done.

It’s as if they think God’s gonna be like, “Oh! I see you didn’t criticize anyone or call out anyone’s bad behavior! Well come on in! Beautiful heaven awaits. Hey, let her in! She didn’t judge anyone. So I’m not going to judge her.”

“But Rock! Christ tells us our sins will be forgiven! He knows we’re imperfect and we all fall short. So it doesn’t make sense for Christians to judge others or feel bad about the things we’ve done.”

Yes, there are Scriptures that talk about God blotting out our sins/transgressions. The Apostle Paul writes in Colossians 2:13-14 that Christ canceled out our sins when he died on the cross. But as I mentioned in my last part, there are conditions to the benefit of having our sins forgiven. The word “if” means something. Even John 3:16 mentions that whoever believes…believe is a verb. That’s an action. You demonstrate whether you “believe” based on how you choose to live.

A lot of people don’t want to know those conditions are. They’re content with their surface-level understanding, accepting parts of the Bible they like while rejecting the parts that don’t conform to their lifestyles. And because some of us have read the entire Bible and use the scriptures to point out those conditions…we run the risk of being called judgmental, self-righteous, and holier than thou.

I keep bringing up this Christian vlogger who claimed she got a BBL (Brazilian Butt-Lift), because she and the Agnostic’s reaction inspired this four-part essay. No lie, if you see that original video…at the end of my reaction, I was really at a loss of words. It wasn’t just my disappointment in her shaming language, but the effect Christians like her have on dissuading people from putting their faith in Christ.

I say that because, for years now, I’ve embraced the criticism of “you’re too judgmental.” Even from a secular point of view, it makes sense that people would tell me this because, if I may say so myself. I’m an intellectual. To tell me “don’t judge” is to tell me “don’t think/don’t form an opinion.” And no, I don’t dwell on things looking for something to point out. But when you’re well trained, using your mind as a muscle the way I do…yeah, it’s difficult to hide the truth from me if things aren’t adding up.

And as a Christian who reads the Bible everyday…again, you become more and more trained to better discern what’s right or wrong according to the Scriptures. So I’m not sitting there looking for unholy things to point out. If I happens upon it, and everyone else is just accepting the immoral behavior as “part of the culture,” I won’t. And if I love the people involved, I’ll say something with caution and discretion.

In the video, she goes on to say, “As much as I love having a Christian Audience, I don’t want the judgmental ones who speak as if they’re perfect or holier than thou, I want the ones who are humble and know that a walk with God is not spotless.” 

To most people, this sounds like a reasonable statement. Sounds harmless. She didn’t say anything wrong, right? But to a thinker such as myself…something isn’t adding up. Allow me to explain.

First off, calling someone “judgmental,” is judgmental. A lot of people do this, where they attach a label to someone without even realizing they’re being judgmental. I just finished watching a Jason Whitlock video where a bunch of NBA personalities claimed Jason was a horrible person who hates black people. That’s a judgment. People are cool with doing things like this, but the minute you call out something immoral…it’s wrong?

This is a shaming tactic where people are trying to get you to stop thinking for yourself, or at the very least, keep it to yourself so they can keep doing whatever they want and feel good about it. 

What most people don’t understand, is that “Judging” has at least three different meanings in the Bible. There’s judging to condemn, as in saying someone’s going to hell. I don’t do that. There’s judging in the sense of executing God’s punishment. I don’t do that. 

Then there’s judging in the sense of discerning what is right and wrong. We should absolutely do this! Here’s a list of Scriptures backing up what I say, and I can debate with the best of them why we should. 

Matthew Chapter 7 says “Judge not lest ye be judged” because the standard by which you judge others, you too will be judged. If you continue to read the rest of that chapter, you’d come to a better realization that Jesus was talking about hypocrites. He was talking about people who use the Scriptures to dictate and take advantage of others while they themselves were living however they want, benefiting from the charity, obedience, and reverence that their followers poured into.

I believe those Scriptures were super important for a long time, at least for a thousand years, because most of the common people could not read the Bible. They relied on the priests and clerics to reveal God’s will, which left them vulnerable to avarice and corruption, the greedy using God’s word to manipulate the masses to serving their will instead of God’s. That’s how you had the crusades and constant warfare amongst the European kings, and corrupt popes like the Borgias.

Christians today can’t use the same excuses as the poor farmers and serfs living before the 1400s. The Bible is free online at BibleGateway.com and you can walk into any church on a Sunday for a service at no charge.

The “Judge Not Lest Ye Be Judged” scriptures at Matthew 7 are for hypocrites. I’m not a hypocrite. I fully understand that I will be held to the same standard that I criticize others. In fact, it strengthens me. Every time I declare these things I’m putting more pressure upon myself to live up to what I’m saying.

I realize that this is a high standard to live by. But it’s not like I just rolled out of bed and boom, I got these standards. I have this standard because I believe…I humbled myself and submitted to being led by God’s word the Bible.

When people use the bulk of Matthew 7 that talks about how we shouldn’t judge…I don’t think they understand what Christ was saying starting at verse 15. 

There Jesus talks about the false prophets. He explains that they may come to you in sheep’s clothing. How do we know that they’re false prophets? Well, Jesus explains that the good fruit falls from the good tree. In verse 20, Christ says, “Thus, by their fruit you will recognize them.” 

Thus, Ladies and Gentlemen…it is your duty to judge and discern what kind of fruit you’re dealing with. That is your personal responsibility. It was the responsibility of those who followed David Koresh at Waco. And it was the responsibility of all who died following Jim Jones in the 70s. 

In Hannah Brown’s interview, she says that people get Christianity and Religion messed up. She says our faith is not to judge others. This is wrong. John 7:24 explicitly says, “Do not judge by appearances, but judge with righteous judgment.” 

The best way to hone your skills and judge with righteous judgment is to read the Bible and apply God’s principles to your life. 2 Timothy Chapter 4 is one of the most powerful examples of Scriptural evidence of how we are commanded as Christians to judge. Starting in verse 2 it says: 

“Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. ³ For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, ⁴ and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths.” 

Boom! Seriously, when they ask “why do you believe in the Bible” it’s because I see evidence of Biblical truth which goes on to strengthen my faith in that which I haven’t seen. The above scriptures are so self-evident. It’s the main reason why the hook-up culture and sex before marriage and the divorce rate it’s mostly due to Christians who accumulate teachers to suit their own passions instead of following Biblical doctrine.

That’s why in 2024…I’m no longer just gonna nod along and smile when people call me judgmental. It’s not cute anymore. We are living in the last days. The ship is going down. And I don’t want to see you perish with the wicked.  

Now…when I hear people call me judgmental, I see the line of horsemen riding out to protect your ego. I see rockets firing from gunships called pride. And I think the Christians who want to silence me care more about hurt feelings than saved souls. I say that, because there are a lot of Christians who know I’m right, but they don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. So, they stand on the ground of, “it’s their choice,” while ignoring the fact that it’s my choice to say something.

But more than anything, I see a lack of shame. It’s there. Someone’s convinced you that shame is weakness and holding you back, so you locked it up and buried it away, ignoring the warnings to the point that you’ve become deaf to it. 

Ladies and gentlemen, shame is not all bad and wretched. I believe God gave us shame for the same reason he gave us fear. To help us preserve our lives. 

When you’re standing on the ledge of a tall building, it’s fear that prompts you to be careful and step away from the ledge. Right?

When you’re doing something wrong in God’s eyes, it’s that Shame that’s prompting you to stop and feel sorry for what you’ve done. Even if you’ve never picked up the Bible, you have it. That’s why you can’t explain it when you feel terrible about something you’ve done even though it’s not illegal or you haven’t hurt anyone. Romans 2:15 alludes to the fact that God imprinted his moral law in all of our hearts. It’s also called a conscience.

That woman who washed Jesus’s feet cried tears of shame and she was rewarded with Christ’s forgiveness.

Jeremiah, was called the weeping prophet. When Jerusalem was under siege from Nebuchadnezzar in 586BC, Jeremiah wrote in Jeremiah 6: 13-16, : 

“From the least to the greatest, all are greedy for gain; prophets and priests alike, all practice deceit. 14 They dress the wound of my people as though it were not serious. ‘Peace, peace,’ they say, when there is no peace. 15 Are they ashamed of their detestable conduct? No, they have no shame at all; they do not even know how to blush. “So they will fall among the fallen: they will be brought down when I punish them,” says the Lord. 

I don’t want to see you fall. So I choose to speak up. I try to do it with love and kindness, but depending on my audience, I may have to be more assertive.

Lastly, let me hit on the issue Self-Righteousness. Because I commented on the above meme and a woman responded with some fair warnings. She more or less warned against judging from a place of “Self-Righteousness” which prompted me to stop and reflect on my own motives.

First off, what is Righteousness vs Self-Righteousness? If you cherry-pick, you can find a scathing scripture at Romans 3:10 that says “there is no one righteous. Not even one.” And if we take that at face value, who am I to say anything? I mean…it’s not like I’m righteous, because no one is. Right?

I did some digging and came across this Website . It says, “The Bible describes the righteous person as just or right, holding to God and trusting in Him (Psalm 33:18–22).” They go on to say, “The bad news is that true or perfect righteousness is not possible for man to attain on his own; the standard is simply too high. The good news is that true righteousness is possible for mankind, but only through the cleansing of sin by Jesus Christ and the indwelling of the Holy Spirit.”

Alright…so then, how is a person “self-righteous”?

The same website explains, Biblically speaking, self-righteousness, which is related to legalism,. Legalism is a term Christians use to describe a doctrinal position emphasizing a system of rules and regulations for achieving both salvation and spiritual growth.

Based on that, “self-righteousness” is the idea that we can somehow generate within ourselves a righteousness that will be acceptable to God (Romans 3:10). They say, “Jesus spends a great deal of time and energy warning His disciples about the dangers of self-righteousness, making it clear that, without Him, they could do nothing (John 15:5).”

They even go on to say, “It would be an understatement to say that every believer is plagued by this attitude. It is in our sin nature to try to do something to merit our salvation. The costly freedom of grace, bought for us by the blood of Jesus with no contribution from us, is difficult for our prideful hearts to understand or appreciate. It is far easier to compare ourselves with one another than it is to recognize that we cannot measure up to the standards of a holy God. However, in Christ we can know true righteousness.“

I honestly wondered if this applied to me. By my sticking to the Scriptures, especially in calling out those who indulge in lifestyles described at 1 Corinthians 6:9-11, am I being legalistic? Am I trying to “do something” to merit my salvation? Am I being self-righteous?

I will continue to reflect on that question and I pray that God works on my heart, but I can answer with complete certainty that I don’t believe I’ve come this far in my Christian journey without God. There are some Christians who are really good about crediting God with almost everything they do. Like, every time you compliment them on an individual level, they respond with, “it’s because of God.”

I confess…I don’t do that so much with every day people unless I feel really moved to do so. Most of my gratitude and the credit I give him is in essays like this, but mostly prayer. I don’t think I’m that kind of Christian that I’m constantly saying, “it’s due to God,” is because…and I may be wrong here…my belief in Him is so strong that it feels like it should go without saying. I’m talking about random things like. “Good job at work today!” and someone will respond with, “I give all glory to God.”

I’m like, yes. Sure. I knew that. It’s through him that all things are possible. So, should I say nothing positive about you, or should I just cut to the chase and thank God that Michele looks nice today? I’m being a bit facetious, but I do believe in being genuine. Not repetitive, or saying things just because it’s expected to be said.

I know it was by the grace of God that I committed to reading the entire Bible twice over and I’ve thanked him thousands of time, almost every morning for blessing me with the opportunity to have a relationship with him. It was by His grace that I was blessed with wisdom and understanding. There were countless times that God sent me people who helped me to understand.

But I get it. It is reasonable to look at me, hear my words and think I’m being Self-Righteous. One of my late cousins bumped heads with me when she told me that I needed to do a “Pharisee Check.” But after calling her up, we talked it out and I understood why she said that. This is a lot of Christians have when you speak on an issue that they’re either struggling with or they’ve failed in the past.

My cousin by i wrote about Single Mothers in this essay…because she used the kind of single mother I was talked about, she took offense. This woman was in her 60s. She was a single mother decades ago. And instead of acknowledging that she didn’t make the best decisions (when she was younger), she lashed out at me with “maybe you should do a Pharisee Check” to basically keep me from thinking I’m something special or better than her.

It’s easy to see it from her perspective. The Pharisees had a similar attitude and Jesus rebuked them. But are we all to stay silent because no one is righteous? Should no one speak up because we all fall short? I don’t think so. Galations 6:1 tells us that if we see others ensnared by sin, we should gently and humbly help that person to the right path.

I can’t think of a single Christian or Biblical figure other than Jesus who didn’t have some plank in their eye, some flaw, or shortcoming that stumbled them. But if everyone stayed silent, thinking to yourself that you are wretched and unworthy to say anything…would any of us be able to obey when Jesus said “go therefore and make disciple of all the nations?”

Truth be told, I think when some people accuse you of “sounding self-righteous,” they really mean, “you sound like you can’t do no wrong,” or “you act like you know more than everybody else.” And of course, I think this is all to protect the person’s ego.

“How is it about protecting their ego?”

Well…what if, I really do just happen to know more than you? If I’ve read the entire Bible twice over, and you’ve only read bits and pieces of it, doesn’t it make sense that I might know more about what’s in it? And again, I think this hits back to my first post about our obsession with equality, thinking we’re all on the same level, as in “we’re all sinners” that means we’re the same…and this is only surface level thinking. The kind you’re comfortable with.

Because if you look deeper, you’d realize that we’re only the same in that we all need God’s grace and the cleansing of sins which was made possible through Christ’s death. However, our knowledge, our strength, our discipline, our obedience, and our affection for Christ…we are not the same. We are individuals and will be judged as individuals. Some of us (a lot) won’t make it. And instead of being threatened or feel defensive by those who YOU deem to be superior…you could just apply yourself and try to get better.

If you’re upset that someone knows more than you, just start reading. It’s free. All it takes is time and effort.

As I’m going to mention in my next post, I’m not above reproach. I certainly have my own vices and I’m not about to pretend to be worthless just to make people feel good.

But I will share this…When I was a kid studying with the Jehovah’s Witnesses, they used to talk about the Kingdom of Heaven and nothing about it sounded appealing to me. They’d speak about it as if the Kingdom was going be filled with nothing but the boring mild-mannered Jehovah’s Witnesses I grew up with and I didn’t like them. I honestly felt, I’d rather just be dead and conscious of nothing than have to go on living in an eternity where everyone in the Kingdom acted like those people.

For those who don’t know, Jehovah’s Witnesses believe in the concept of Annihilationism, where this is no hell and people burning for all eternity when they die. The belief is when you die, you’re simply conscious of nothing. And, back then, I favored that more so than being in Kingdom of Heaven with nothing but Jehovah’s Witnesses.

But as I grew up, HOWEVER…and read the Bible, immersing myself in Christ…I changed my ways. My faith in God is so strong that I’m not worried about Judgment Day. If God rejects me, I accept his judgment because I know I’ve fallen short so many times and trust that God’s ways are just.

Even if that means, as Atheists would like to argue, that I died for nothing. That my entire life being spent having resisted temptation, died a virgin, and missed out on all the pleasures that everyone else indulged in…I don’t care. While the reward of everlasting life is nice. There’s a more important reason why I choose to live this way.

It’s because I believe that once upon a time, a man was nailed to a cross and died in my place. He was perfect. He never did anything wrong. But he sacrificed himself so that I could have the gift of everlasting life. What kind of man would I be if I’m like, “Nah. No thanks. I’m good.”

I live my life because I love, respect, and honor God. It’s out of love and respect for Christ that it bothers me when those who call themselves Christians display this nonchalant, cavalier, I’m “forgiven-no-matter- what” attitude when it comes to disobeying our Lord. And yes…there is a bit of sadness when I see how the disobedience has inadvertently made my life more difficult. Such as the difficulty in finding a beautiful God-fearing wife who’s also willing to wait until marriage to have sex.

“So, you’re bitter. Is that what you’re telling us, Rock?”

Bitter. Resentful. Jealous. There’s no denying that I am suffering. It’s embarrassing to admit. When researching Bitterness, this website says, “The person who is bitter is often resentful, cynical, harsh, cold, relentless, and unpleasant to be around. Any expression of these characteristics is sin against God.” Hebrews 12:15

And yet…to my close friends, I don’t think they’d describe me as any of that. Over the Christmas break, I was invited to many functions. There’s even a woman from my old church group who reached out and encouraged me to come back because “others really benefited from you.”

Even my Worldly associates seem to appreciate having a Christian like me around because a lot of Atheist and Agnostics…the Christians they don’t like are the ones who call themselves Christians but don’t stand on their principles. There have been plenty of functions where I’ve gone to events and got into deep debates where the non-believers walked away with a greater respect for Christians like me who talk the talk and walk the walk.

In closing, what I really want to get across is despite my knowledge and obedience to the Scriptures, I’m constantly checking myself to make sure I’m not overstepping my bounds, to make sure that I’m not self-righteous or acting like a Pharisee.

I think the “Suffering” I endure does not come from bitterness or jealousy. I hate the world as the Bible tells us we should. And that hatred comes from my love of God and the loved ones I want to see in the Kingdom of Heaven.

But more than anything, the suffering I endure comes from the fact that I am ridiculously hard on myself. Seriously, as much as I’ve been critical of others in these past few posts…you have no idea how much I tear myself apart for my own weaknesses and worldly desires. I deny myself. But if I didn’t have the desire in the first place, there would be nothing to deny.

Which is why I continue to pray for God to work on my heart. Because it’s not easy.

I’m very much like the plot of the 1990s movie “Speed.” Where if I slow down past a certain point…if I stop being productive or stop working towards some goal or accomplishment, that’s when I become aware of all the pain and suffering I’m enduring in my attempt to pick up the cross and follow Christ. That’s when I really struggle. (Matt 16:24-26)

Why You NEED Christians Who Are Holier than Thou 

Alright…last one. This is part four of the reasons why we need to abolish this fear of being called “judgemental” in 2024. Because all it’s doing is silencing those who should be speaking up, while enabling those who need to hear the Truth.

Just to recap! In Part 1, I broke down this generation’s obsession with equality and need to be accepted by the world so much that they care more about what humans think than what God thinks. In Part 2, I explained that a lot of Christians are afraid to learn the truth about why we should judge, because it would mean actually demonstrating whether you “believe” instead of merely just saying it (talk is cheap).

In Part 3, I explained that “Judge Not Lest Ye Be Judged” is mostly talking about Hypocrites and it is our personal responsibility to judge in order to help others who have fallen astray and to discern when we’re dealing with false prophets. (Galations 6:1, Matt 7)

In this thrilling conclusion, I’m going to explain why you shouldn’t be afraid or look down on the Christians who YOU THINK are holier than thou. These might be the very same people who have a hand in saving your life.

Sure, some can be annoying. Some people don’t know the meaning of discretion, time and place. And when you really do love your sinful behavior, when you just want to relax, take it easy and not care about how God feels about every little thing…these Christians can be infuriating. I get it. So, let’s talk about it.

Of course, I have to recall the Christian Vlogger who inspired these essays. She got a BBL and in this video, she claimed, “As much as I love having a Christian Audience, I don’t want the judgmental ones who speak as if they’re perfect or holier than thou, I want the ones who are humble and know that a walk with God is not spotless.” 

This is shaming language designed to portray true God-fearing as Christians egotistical, self-righteous, lame, and undesirable.  

First off, when people claim that you’re “holier than thou” or “self-righteous,” I believe in MOST cases, not all…it’s usually because you’ve demonstrated a greater knowledge of God or you’ve shown that you actually live by a standard that they’ve not only failed to keep, but they don’t want to keep.

Essentially, you’ve put them to shame. And instead of acknowledging their shortcomings and that they should work on getting better, its much easier to attack and defend their egos. Especially if they’ve known you for a long time and you put in the work to improve so drastically that you’re no longer the person they used to like hanging out with.

The truth is, ladies and gentlemen, you are going to run into Christians who appear to be “holier than thou” because they probably put in more effort than you to 1) Draw close to God by reading his Word the Bible and 2) resisting the temptations of this world at a very great personal expense that often produces suffering, which in turns produces character, which in turn produces hope that doesn’t put them to shame. (Romans 5:3-5)

The strength by which true Christians stand in that faith, can come off as if they’re self-righteous or holier than thou. But I’d argue, that how you react to them says more about you than you think.

For instance, while it is true that the Bible encourages Christians to walk in grace and humility…have you noticed that the ones who tend to criticize Christians for acting too haughty are usually the same kind of Christians who live worldly lifestyles? The Christian Blogger with the BBL says she wants the ones who are “humble.” But is she? Does she come off as humble?

I’d say she’s the one who needs to humble herself, she and every other Christian who’s so put off by those who truly are striving to put God first. What do I mean?  

Well…if you’re a high school basketball player who wants to get better to compete at a higher level, would you seek out elementary kids to play against? Or would you seek out those who are actually better than you? 

If you want to get smarter. Hang around those who are smarter than you. If you want to get stronger, hang around those who are stronger. And if you want to be a better Christian and draw close to God, a good way to improve is hang around those who are doing just that. It’s the most constructive and beneficial peer pressure there is.

When I started boxing in 2017, because I wanted to get better, I humbled myself and took constructive criticism, not just from the Coaches, but there were teenagers and kids much younger than me giving me pointers on how to properly extend the jab, or to keep my feet distanced when I move. Furthermore, I studied and watched tapes of the greats. From Mike Tyson, to Lomachenko, and Canelo Alvarez. Each boxer excelled at something I wanted to improve on so I humbled myself to get better.

As I mentioned in my last post, a lot of Christians seem to think that if you don’t judge others, then that somehow absolves you from being judged yourself. As if God’s gonna see you, see that you never criticized or called anyone else out, and He’s going to be like, “Oh! Let her in. She never said a word when Becky was sleeping with six different guys in the same month. She didn’t judged, so I’m not going to judge her!”

The above meme is so appropriate, because the common response you’d get from people is, “Oh! I don’t mind being judged. But only by God. Not you humans! Only God can judge me …so there!“

Being judged/criticized by us humans…the most damage it’ll do is to your pride/ego and it’ll make you feel sad, offended, or ashamed. And if it’s a Christian who really loves you, then you should know that he’s not happy to do it.

We don’t want to lose you as a friend or a family member. But you have to understand, that our love for you as well as our faith in knowing what’s going to happen on Judgment Day, even if it means you never want to talk to us again, if what we said helps you to repent…that’s a heavy sacrifice I have to make.

Many aren’t. That’s why you have Christians going to pride events and gay weddings. They’ll tell themselves that they’re demonstrating love and support, to keep the doors open for your return to Christ. But really, I believe a lot of these Christians say nothing because they’re too afraid to hurt your feelings. They want you to be happy.

I’m afraid to hurt your feelings too. But if I end up cutting you as I reach out to pull you into this lifeboat, ladies and gents…it’s out of love. Love for you and love for Christ.

Matt 10:37 tells us, “Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.“

When you’re judged by God on Judgment Day…that’s it! It’s not just criticism, it’s the final sentence. There are no second chances. No time to repent. It’s over! You’re done! You’re either saved or you’re not. And make no mistake, Christ makes it clear that many will come saying “Lord Lord,” but he will say he never knew you. Only those who DO (action/demonstrates) the will of the father in heaven. (Matt 7:21-23)

Seriously…part of my passion when it comes to all this is my strong imagination. The 7th Day Adventist put together an amazing documentary about Noah and the Great Flood, I edited just the snippet below where it depicts God closing the door of the Ark and what happens when the flood comes. I encourage you to just take a moment and watch the whole thing…see if it doesn’t change your perspective or the urgency to repent.

Now, obviously there were a lot of creative liberties, but I fully back the video. The people had a chance to change. They saw Noah building the ark for well over a 100 years. But when God closed that door…ladies and gentlemen, that was it. No second chances.

It’s not difficult for me to imagine all my friends and family outside that ark. Men. Women. Children. The End Times are coming. The Great Tribulation. Famine. Plagues. Disasters. Last year, I had but a small sample of unbearable grief and heartache when a cousin I held as my sister was gunned down. She was just one person. I still have many who are close to my heart, and the though of them being destroyed…

That’s how I know I’m not self-righteous, though I continuously reflect on my motives. My hatred for this world stems from my love of the people ensnared by it. The passion and vitriol by which I write is because I believe in the Scriptures. I love you. I don’t want you to die for all eternity. I want you to be saved and I hate that Satan has his claws in so many of us, so I fight. I put on the sword and shield of Ephesians 6 and use the knowledge God has blessed me with to fight back.

Going back to the Christian who got her BBL, I suspect the real reason why she’s seeking the ones who are humble and not judgmental, is so she can continue coasting by on what she thinks she knows about God and the Bible, instead of learning more and risking finding out the truth, the truth being…that God may disapprove of what you’re doing and how you’re choosing to live. 

I don’t say that to be demeaning…but if you’re worried about feeling small by those words, I say, embrace it. Forget what I’m saying, go straight to the Bible and allow yourself to feel small, like a child. Humble yourself! We’re not kings and queens. We are Christ’s followers. Servants. Christ washed the feet of all his disciples. Would you do the same for your friends?

“You’re always talking about being humble! So why do you act all high and mighty. Why do you act like you’re so much better than everyone else?!” 

One, if by high and mighty…do you mean with confidence? Because while the Bible does talk about being meek and humble…I’d argue that when it comes to wickedness and this Satanic world, we must have the heart of lions to resist it. And if you stand with the world, thinking we should too, it makes sense why you’d see us as arrogant or all high and mighty.

Recall Daniel’s friends in Daniel Chapter 3, his friends Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego when they, along with all the people were commanded to fall down and worship a golden idol. Daniel’s friends refused to obey this command. Even at the risk of a fiery death in a furnace, they held their ground and maintained their faith.

In verse 16, they said, “O Nebuchadnezzar, we have no need to answer you in this matter. ¹⁷ If this be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of your hand, O king.”

Does that sound like your definition of humble? A demonstration of a Christian being humble comes in our faith and obedience to God and his word the Bible. An example of this is when the Bible tells wives to submit to their husband’s authority. Or for men to honor their wives in a self-sacrificing way the way Christ did for us. If you reject these scriptures because you don’t like them, are you really humble?

And my Second Point, is let’s say a Christian does act all high and mighty, why does it bother you so much? 

I’ve already talked about my generation’s obsession with thinking we’re all the same so I’m not going to rehash that. I’m just going to be completely honest here. 

My parents raised me to do my best. If I set out to write a book, I’m going all in. If I set out to work out and lose weight, I’m giving it my all. When I get married, it’s for life. And when I say Christ is my Lord and Savior, I really do see him as my king. 

Now, before you get mad at me or anyone else for acting or thinking we’re better…have you ever truly put in the work, effort, and dedication to be good at something you set out to do? Because everything I’m good at, I worked at it. It took years to get this far and it wasn’t easy. 

If it makes you feel better, I can tell you that I’m far from perfect and I battle my own lineup of demons every day. I’m surrounded by temptation and the passions and desires of my heart are strong. They say the hormones die down when you hit your 30s, but I’m just as hot-blooded as I was in my 20s.  

Even when it comes my Christianity, I love it when I find people who are 10x spiritually stronger than myself. Last year, with the church group I joined, there was a woman named Ms. Teri who led some the most beautiful prayers I’ve ever heard. I used to wonder how people could pray “all day” the way you hear about in the past. But when I heard Ms. Teri pray, the way she prayed about others, praying for our specific hardships, thanking God for the specific blessings we revealed, and the love and joy she put into it…her prayers were long but I was never bored, nor did my mind start to wander off. It was amazing. I’ll never forget that.

Sometimes, I need these stronger Christians. I need their strength. 

Last year, I went to Christ’s Memorial where I was surrounded by Jehovah’s Witnesses who all appeared holier than thou. I didn’t hate them. My reaction was almost equal to but opposite of Hannah Brown when she was called out about her sexual immorality.  

What was my vice…my vice are dark violent thoughts. Psalms 11:5 tells us that “The Lord examines the righteous, but the wicked, those who love violence, he hates with a passion.”

I’m not sure if I “love” violence. I’m not a fan of gore. I don’t care about guns and explosions. And I’m the kind of guy who will swerve and risk an accident just to avoid running over a squirrel. All life is precious to me, none more so than humans, especially children, so I could never kill anyone unless it’s to protect someone I love.

However, hand to hand combat…ever since I was a kid, I’ve always just had a talent for it. I used to get bullied by both boys and girls until 2nd grade when I discovered martial arts. And man…I was just a natural at it. I didn’t have a teacher. I didn’t take classes. I could just see a move, and practice it until I got good. So, martial arts, boxing, hand to hand combat…in a bar fight, you’re going to want me on your side. Does that mean I’m a lover of violence? I don’t know.

But I do know the thoughts of revenge run strong in me. There’s a Marvel character named Sebastian Shaw who has the super power to absorb energy and transform it to raw strength.  

That’s kind of how I am when it comes to my hatred and anger towards offenses and injustices I’ve had to bear. I have the strength and discipline to keep from acting out on my rage. But it’s there. And ever since I was 17, I’ve been able to convert these negative feelings into the fuel that drives me. I know that sounds cheesy, but this is a true event that happened to me during my junior year of high school.

Long-story-short, in the summer of 2003, I heard stories about how my father told courts I wasn’t his real son. I was dealing with a hatred for organized religion because one of my brothers was a hypocrite who was treated like the golden child while I was the black sheep. I was alone. No one to talk to. No one who understood. So when I started my junior year, I didn’t care about my future. I was ready to fail all my classes, because what’s the point.

That’s when my Drama Teacher took the time to read a letter I wrote, where I explained what happened that summer. She wrote me back and encouraged me to use all those negative things as motivations to graduate and get up out of my parents house.

Ever since then, it was like a switch was turned on in my brain. I used to think only you needed only positive energy and encouragement to do well like you see with those 90s TV families. There wasn’t a lot of that. Meanwhile, I was drowning in a sea of anger and animosity. And when that switch was made, I became a match and took flight. I haven’t stopped ever since.

And I tried. When I read the entire Bible by the time I was 30, I learned from Jesus’s example and finally learned to let go and forgive others. And I realized, I had been reliant on my anger for so long, getting by on the compliments and attaboys from people, it just doesn’t hit the same way. Not to mention, it doesn’t happen every day. For some reason the effects of “positive encouragement” is ephemeral, while an offense can burn for days if not, weeks.

And so…every injustice I see, every painful feeling I encounter, I just bottle that up and use it to stay driven and motivated. For those who still don’t get it, it’s like on days when you don’t feel like getting out of bed, when you don’t feel like hitting the gym, or going to work, or doing your very best…some men do it because they have mouths to feed. There’s a love for their wife and kids driving them to work hard and provide. But when you don’t have that, what else are you going to use?

Last year, after my beloved cousin was murdered, I learned that when she was alive, her baby daddy tried to strangle her. This baby daddy is a 32-year-old man who’s still living in Colorado Springs.

Here’s some horrible truth about me. Not only did I fantasize about beating this guy to an inch of his life almost every night when I hit the gym…I honestly saw him as a threat to another loved one, another cousin who’s like a baby sister to me. I wanted to eliminate that threat. It was strong.

So, when I attended Christ’s Memorial, surrounded by holier than thou Jehovah’s Witnesses…I had a breakdown where I started crying uncontrollably. I was so ashamed of all the hatred and rage that I’d been bottling up inside. I hadn’t forgiven him and that was wrong. I needed help. I needed Christians who were stronger. Holier than myself. 

I got that help. The church group I met with last year was kind enough to listen and they poured their love into me. Such encouragement. Such friendship. I’ll never forget that. Weeks after I confessed all this to them, I started to get better. I prayed every day for God’s help and begged for the ability to forgive, and by May, when I went to Colorado for my cousin’s graduation…I no longer had a desire to kill this guy (though I’d be lying if i said i don’t want to break his arm. I’m still working on letting that go. I’m sorry. I’m ashamed).

My point is…finding Christians who may be “holier than thou” could be just the medicine you need to help get over sin/vice you’re struggling with.

Lastly, the woman’s line about wanting the ones who are “humble and know that a walk with God is not spotless” sounds like an innocuous statement. But really, she means she only wants the lukewarm Christians who’s cool and comfortable with breaking God’s commandments, the ones who aren’t too bothered by living sinful lifestyles because “hey! Who’s perfect? Am I right?!” 

It’s influencers like the one who got the BBL in Christ’s name who are the wolves in sheep’s clothing that Christ warned about. Not all wolves speak from the pulpit and have cult-like followings. All who claim to be Christians while encouraging you, enabling you, condoning you for embracing your sins…these are wolves!  

Don’t be deceived. They’re pretty. They’re good looking. They say they’re blessed and living their best life, highlighting all the fun while those who have truly picked up their crosses are enduring a life that pales in comparison to the popular Christians tearing it up in clubs, getting drunk, and laid every weekend.  

Lastly, as I’m going to hit on in a future essay…Consider the damage done to those on the fence about believing in God. Or the hit it does to Christians who grew up in the church but lose faith based on the lifestyles led by immoral Christians.  

In the video, the black guy calls out fake Christians and rebukes us saying, “how many of you guys hold this woman accountable?”  

He makes a good point. One way to hold her accountable is to call her out on her bad behavior. Doing this, would mean judging her. And if you’ve gathered nothing from these essays, remember this…the reason why Christians hate being judged is because they don’t want to be held accountable. It is an attack on what they think they know. Retaliation is understandable.  

But if you know you’re right and you have the Bible to back it up…don’t back down. Especially when it comes to those you love.