“Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.” – 1 John 2:15
“If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you.” – John 15:19
Yesterday (Tuesday Oct 10, 2023), a 60-year-old co-worker I’ve known for years…she’s someone I enjoy teasing and is almost like a mother figure to me. She said, “Rock, you’re so contradicting. You’re supposed to be this Christian, but it seems like you really don’t like people.”
She said this upon hearing how I am in my boxing class. I pick the heavy bag that’s away from everyone else with my back turned to others so it’s easier for me to focus and not worry about what everyone else is doing. She also knows that I don’t like crowds or social events where all you do is just socialize.
I explained, “I love and care about people as Christ tells us, but…it’s not that I hate people. It’s just disappointing. It’d be like if my brother was a thief who robs and steals. I still love my brother, but I’d be disappointed with him. It’d probably bother me if I hung out with him and all he did was brag about his things…things I know he bought with stolen money.”
For those who don’t know, Gynocentrism is the dominant or primary focus on women. It’s the opinion that we currently live in a society that panders and prioritizes the wants, feelings, and needs of women over the men, children, government, or even law and order.
Please understand, what I’m about to discuss is likely going to sound offensive. But before you pull out your pitchforks and torches…ask yourselves, what’s your reaction when you hear things like “the future is female” or “down with the patriarchy“? Just keep it in mind as I begin.
Here, I expound on the fourth of eight main points I’ve personally observed to help explain how one thing after another has sabotaged (ruined) dating for my generation. And at the end of each section, I’ll try my best to provide a solution because, I know…these sound like excuses. But I haven’t given up. I still have faith.
The Hook-Up Culture (Non-Monogamous Dating)
Tinder (Dating Apps)
Cat-Calling and False Accusations
Gynocentric Worship of Women
Brett Kavanaugh and Weaponizing Women
The Rise of the Manosphere
The Sisterhood
Leaving Christianity at the Door
In a Gynocentric society, the main goal is to encourage women to ascend to what is perceived to be “better positions,” positions that were traditionally held by men. Whether it’s in sports, leadership roles, politics, family, or the corporate boardroom, women are encouraged to be at the top.
With this one, I want to make it clear that I’m not trying to hurt anyone’s feelings or bash anyone…but it’s something I’ve been in denial about for a long time.
Ever since I was a kid, I’ve been picked on, shamed, and made to feel bad for being attracted to white girls. And, shamed to say, I’ve struggled when it comes to finding the average black woman attractive. I’m not saying anyone’s ugly. I’m just saying that very often the attraction is not there. I wish it was, but it’s not. Brace yourself. I don’t hold anything back with this one.
To love someone, you must first love yourself. Because if you don’t love yourself, how could you ever love someone else? Sounds like a profound question. In fact, the notion of loving yourself sounds all good and proper. And yet, through mere observation…something seems off.
The first time I heard about this notion of “loving yourself” was when I was 23-years-old, back in January 2010. It was by a Scientologist from my acting class, an older Venezuelan singer in his mid-30s. I remember that night. He spotted me on the treadmill while driving by the gym. I ended my work-out and we talked for hours about philosophy, love, and life. I remember his name. Jessy Leros!
This guy, who was signed by Sony and went on to star in NCIS New Orleans, was kind enough to school me, turning on my critical thinking skills, teaching me that just because two ways are presented to you, it doesn’t mean you can’t create a third. And it was him who told me, “in order to love someone, you must first love yourself.”
He said this because, back then…I was still about 312lbs and had a crush on one of the girls in our acting class. I confided in him about my lack of confidence. She was gorgeous and I really was this big, fat, ugly black dude. You can tell just by looking at Jessy that it’s hard to believe he ever had that problem. But still, he insisted the key was for me to focus on myself. To love myself. Be confident in myself. To have greater respect for myself.
Even before talking to Jessy, there were other Scientologists in the class imparting a similar philosophy. The emphasis on “self” was one of their main talking points. They had a very enticing concept that was, “What’s true for you is true for you…” which is tantamount to self-acceptance. It’s a shortened quote from L.Ron Hubbard, the founder of Scientology, who says, “What is true for you is what you have observed yourself. And when you lose that, you have lost everything.”
Psychology is the study of mind and behavior. I could go to school and spend years studying the greats like Freud, Pavlov, and Carl Jung…or I could just pick up and read the Bible. I’m not knocking those men or their work. But who better to find out the truth about ourselves, than from the One who created us?
God made humans in his image. That alone should give you some indication that we are more than just mere “creatures”. The Book of Genesis teaches us that God gave us dominion over all other creatures on the planet. I’m pointing this out not to rile up animal lovers…but to emphasize how much God favors us.
And what if I told you that not only did he create us in his image, he also embedded in us the feelings, instincts, and a sense of right and wrong? How many times have you heard this?: “I’m not a Christian. I’m not a believer, but I’m still a good person. You can be a moral person without being a Christian!”
I’ll Have My Fun Now and Get Religious Later…Would that work?
In this essay, I answer that question and describe the difficulties Christians face when it comes to resisting temptation, while trying to find that elusive good Christian mate if you’re not part of a congregation.
I’ll Have Fun Now and Get Religious Later… – A Theocratic Essay By Rock Tennie
When I was a kid, I must have been thirteen when I looked around the congregation and saw that it was mostly filled with older people. Aside from my brothers, about two other families had kids our age. There was hardly anyone in their 20s and 30s.
My parents became religious Jehovah’s Witnesses when I was eleven, effectively ending the fun things we used to enjoy, like celebrating birthdays and holidays. So, it was only a matter of time before I asked them.
“How about this? How about let me enjoy life and have all the fun I want while I’m still young. And then when I get older, that’s when I’ll get super religious and dedicate my life to God?”
My mom said, “It doesn’t work like that. Because you have the knowledge now. You can’t claim ignorance.”
At the time, I felt this was very cruel of them. I didn’t ask for that knowledge. It was thrust upon me. So when I went to school and saw my peers being able to join sports teams and hang out with each other after school, peers who could talk to each other over the phone and get together for fun events on the weekends…part of me felt jealous and left out, like an alien amongst humans.
It’s been well over a month since I’ve been in a gym and it’s strange. Growing up, I never thought “the gym” would be one of those things I couldn’t do without. It certainly makes me realize how much I appreciate it. Because if it wasn’t for Anytime Fitness…I’d probably still weigh 378lbs
By Rock Tennie
Date – May 4th, 2020
THE GLUTTON:
Let me take you back to the summer of 2007. Back then “Sexy Back” was getting played out on the radio and “High School Musical” was all the rage. I was coming up on my 21st birthday and weighed a whopping 378lbs. I was a glutton. I loved to eat. I lacked discipline. And my college job was a pizza delivery driver. So, I ate pizza almost every night and drank it all down with Dr Pepper.
I’m not attracted to unnecessary drama and conflict. If you project the image of someone who has an attitude or constantly confrontational, you’re going to attract people of that nature. It’s as simple as that. And believe it or not, there are people who would prefer the thrilling emotional roller coaster ride of an unstable relationship, as opposed to a stable (predictable) peaceful one. Even if they don’t realize it.
You attract the energy you put out. I know this sounds nice and catchy, but I don’t think people really understand what it means. This here essay is inspired by some of the most beautiful women I see on Instagram and Youtube videos like the one below…They aren’t celebrities. Just people blessed with beauty. And yet the attitude they project make them so unappealing in the eyes of men like me.
“It’s just a performance, Rock. These girls aren’t like this in real life.”
You’re talking to an artist. With every decision we make in creating our art, there’s always a reason why. There’s always a motive. If you think I’m overthinking it, I can just as easily say you haven’t thought about it enough.
The energy they’re putting out is sex. Like all they want to do is get sex. And if you put out that energy, guess what kind of men you’re going to get. Men who only want sex. And then they wonder why the men they’re attracting have a tendency to sleep around on them.
Growing up, some of the most unpleasant experiences I had with the opposite sex came in the heat of an argument where there was usually a lot of yelling, accusations, and name calling. There was a lot of attitude, malice, and resentment. Feelings were hurt. I’d usually walk away and want nothing more to do with the person. Of course, tempers would simmer and we’d usually talk it out and come to some kind of resolution…but as a sane rational man, I didn’t enjoy those heated confrontations. They weren’t pleasant.
So why do some women think displaying such attitudes will attract a good man? Who told them that this is what men want?
Put it this way, if you posted photos of identical twin sisters…which do you think a good man would go for, the photo of the twin who’s projecting a fierce “sexy” attitude…or the identical twin who’s smiling like she’s happy to see you? Which would you choose? I’m sorry, let me reiterate. Which would you be more likely to spend the rest of your life with?
And if you’re the type of guy who’d be like, “I’d still hit the one with the lion. She looks like fun.” Be real. Ask yourself, “which are you more likely to approach?” Especially in today’s MeToo society.
One of the worse causes of depression among my generation is this notion that we have to keep experiencing new things, that we should never be content, that we should always put ourselves outside of our comfort zones.
Is that the way it’s always been? Back before psychology was a thing. Before Freud and the practice of therapy, is that what the average human strove for?
Here’s what I think is happening. It’s just like in high school where the cool kids think they know best. Where the majority of the student body looks up to the popular kids and want to emulate them. We thought we left that culture behind upon graduation, but thanks to social media where the lifestyles and opinions of celebrities and public figures are instantly made available, we’re stuck. They’ve influenced normal people. Normal people emulate them. And then those normal people blast their lifestyles on social media to their friends and family, showing off how much fun they’re having in life through pictures and posts.
None of this should be a bad thing, if humans were content with life. There’s nothing wrong with having a friend going to Bora Bora and posting pictures from the most beautiful beaches, driving fast cars and lounging with hot women in bikinis. However, it becomes a problem when people like him and society start to pressure others to strive for something similar. Where, because you’ve traveled around the world and enjoyed it, you assume everyone should to really experience life. Where, because you’ve had sex with some of the most beautiful women in the world, you encourage others to do the same or else they’re missing out on life. Continue Reading
Recently I saw an old crush who had let herself go. I remember how beautiful she used to be. I was planning on hitting the gym that night…but honestly felt a bit discouraged after that. I thought to myself, “what’s the point”?
Brace yourself…I’m going to say a lot of things that’s not exactly nice to hear. But it’s a reality I think a lot of people either deny or ignore.
For the past few years, men have taken a beating thanks to assholes in Hollywood like Harvey Weinstein. I think the only men not affected wave of outrage are ones who were already married or don’t watch the news. For years, we’ve been hearing it, “Men need to get right. Men need to step up!”
In one of my last essays, I wrote about how “Godly Men Don’t Care About Money”. But we still love women. They are one of my main sources of motivation. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t need a beautiful woman to want to better myself. But it’s like the train was already on the tracks, moving non-stop, and the idea of being with a beautiful woman served as coal to the flames to crank it up full-steam ahead.
Beautiful…That’s the key. Or rather it used to be before pop culture started trying to make us feel bad for putting so much value on a woman’s looks. Shallow. Superficial, we’re called. However, from what I’ve seen, women openly praise other women for their looks, even more than they compliment men unless it’s a man that every other woman has already complimented and deemed to be “hot.” It’s all about encouragement that they’re feeding each other. And that’s cool to an extent.
But if I want to be an Olympic sprinter and I spend all my time eating junk food and playing video games…are people really helping me by saying things like, “Yeah, you’re on track! You’re gonna get gold! Good for you!” without pointing out that I should probably get out and practice running?
I know Hollywood and society’s trying so hard to have us believe your beauty shouldn’t matter. That we should care more about your degree, your job, or how much money you make. However, courtship is a selection process. Your beauty is one of the main answers to the question of, “Why you?” Continue Reading