I’m not afraid to die alone. When most people hear about how long I’ve been single, it’s easy to assume I’m just a man “going my own way” (MGTOW). I’m not. I’m glad I discovered Sigmas...because I’ve concluded a majority of people just don’t understand. And when they don’t understand you…clearly, there’s something wrong with you.
After about 3 months of starting online dating again…I learned that not much has changed since I tried the last time back in 2014. Except the sites cost more. But this isn’t to complain about the dating culture in general. At this point, it’s about as pointless as complaining about water being wet.
What I’m about to say…I’m speaking on behalf of myself. I don’t know if other 35-year-old single men are like me. But here goes.
Ever since I was young, my father taught me to set goals for myself and to accomplish whatever I said I’m going to do. I love that. I’m great at that and derive an incredible boost of confidence and self-worth from my ability to accomplish those goals. That being said…I don’t like to make goals in which my success depends too much on another person. In this case, my getting married and having children depends on another person wanting to commit to me.
Here is where you’ll have all the Red Pill voices, all the dating coaches, all the playas and Old-School Macks chime in about how you CAN have a great deal of control in how others perceive you. I’ve heard it all. Focus on your money, career, and success and you’ll attract a mate. Focus on hitting the gym and making yourself physically attractive and you’ll attract a mate. Focus on your social skills, build up the confidence and ability to spit game and you’ll attract a mate. Focus on going out and attending events where hot women go and you’ll attract a mate. We’ve heard it all ever since high school.
And I’m not saying any of that’s wrong. There’s a great deal of truth in all of that advice. What I question is the emphasis placed on “attracting a mate”. As if that should be our number one goal in life, above things like doing what’s good in God’s eyes. And more importantly, what if none of that just isn’t you? Are these men who don’t have those goals simply out of luck? I don’t think so.
I know… the Devil is Working Hard To Make It Seem Like You Don’t Exist. When you see what’s going on in the world, and you know you’re no part of it, it does feel rather hopeless, as it did last year, when you see mass groups of people rising up in common anger, indignation, but ultimately a purpose. A purpose that may be far different from your own.
We as Christians know that you can’t put your faith in human beings. All these calls for “justice” and “equality” are futile notions because we know the justice and equality they’re talking about isn’t universal. Meaning, it isn’t justice and equality for everyone, just them and their ilk, and their feelings.
With Black Lives Matter particularly, even after the Chauvin Verdict, we already see them and SJWs moving the goal post. They got their desired verdict but it’s not enough. It’ll never be enough. Let me repeat that. It WILL NEVER BE ENOUGH.
In reading the Bible cover to cover, the biggest change of my life is that it freed me from this world. Life is so much more fulfilling now…now that I know my purpose and the blessings that’ll come from simply enduring until the end.
My relationship with human beings…it’s a love/hate relationship. I have so much compassion for them as my brethren and God’s created children. But I also feel the same indignation any brother would feel when you see them walking down a path of destruction, especially when you know what our parents told us. And just like any brother when everyone’s all grown up, you have to accept that your siblings are free to make their own decisions, they’re own choices.
Imagine this…Everyone’s on the Titanic and we’re told the ship is going to sink at some point. You look around and everyone’s having a good time but because you heard the captain, you know the Titanic is going to get hit by an iceberg. You don’t know when. So you’re told to remain awake. If you accept the captain’s orders and do what you’re told, your place is reserved on the lifeboats. But everyone else…they’re going down with the ship.
It hasn’t happened yet. And because it hasn’t happened, despite being told to stay awake for so long…the people lack faith. They stop believing. They say the captain’s orders don’t make sense. They begin to think they know better than the captain. They criticize and make fun of you for following the captain’s orders instead of indulging in the fun inebriation they lose themselves in. Even the ones who believed in the beginning start to fall away. They see everyone else having a good ole’ time, sleeping and partying, so they think to themselves that maybe the ship won’t sink after all. They stop following orders. They ignore the captain.
Then the inevitable happens. The ship hits an iceberg. The massive Titanic that everyone had so much faith in, that they believed was unsinkable…it begins to list. Chaos and panic ensues. Just as the captain warned, the only ones who will be saved on the lifeboats are the ones who obeyed his commands until the end.
Jesus Christ teaches us to love our brothers and sisters, to love our fellow neighbors as we would ourselves. If I was in one of those lifeboats watching as the ship went down…I imagine I’d be clenching my teeth in grief and frustration. I’d wish I didn’t care…but God knows I do. Those are my brothers and sisters on that ship.
Psychology is the study of mind and behavior. I could go to school and spend years studying the greats like Freud, Pavlov, and Carl Jung…or I could just pick up and read the Bible. I’m not knocking those men or their work. But who better to find out the truth about ourselves, than from the One who created us?
God made humans in his image. That alone should give you some indication that we are more than just mere “creatures”. The Book of Genesis teaches us that God gave us dominion over all other creatures on the planet. I’m pointing this out not to rile up animal lovers…but to emphasize how much God favors us.
And what if I told you that not only did he create us in his image, he also embedded in us the feelings, instincts, and a sense of right and wrong? How many times have you heard this?: “I’m not a Christian. I’m not a believer, but I’m still a good person. You can be a moral person without being a Christian!”