Alright…last one. This is part four of the reasons why we need to abolish this fear of being called “judgemental” in 2024. Because all it’s doing is silencing those who should be speaking up, while enabling those who need to hear the Truth.
In this thrilling conclusion, I’m going to explain why you shouldn’t be afraid or look down on the Christians who YOU THINK are holier than thou. These might be the very same people who have a hand in saving your life.
Sure, some can be annoying. Some people don’t know the meaning of discretion, time and place. And when you really do love your sinful behavior, when you just want to relax, take it easy and not care about how God feels about every little thing…these Christians can be infuriating. I get it. So, let’s talk about it.
Just to recap! In Part 1, I broke down this generation’s obsession with equality and need to be accepted by the world so much that they care more about what humans think than what God thinks. In Part 2, I explained that a lot of Christians are afraid to learn the truth about why we should judge, because it would mean actually demonstrating whether you “believe” instead of merely just saying it (talk is cheap).
In Part 3, I explained that “Judge Not Lest Ye Be Judged” is mostly talking about Hypocrites and it is our personal responsibility to judge in order to help others who have fallen astray and to discern when we’re dealing with false prophets. (Galations 6:1, Matt 7)
Of course, I have to recall the Christian Vlogger who inspired these essays. She got a BBL and in this video, she claimed, “As much as I love having a Christian Audience, I don’t want the judgmental ones who speak as if they’re perfect or holier than thou, I want the ones who are humble and know that a walk with God is not spotless.”
This is shaming language designed to portray true God-fearing as Christians egotistical, self-righteous, lame, and undesirable.
First off, when people claim that you’re “holier than thou” or “self-righteous,” I believe in MOST cases, not all…it’s usually because you’ve demonstrated a greater knowledge of God or you’ve shown that you actually live by a standard that they’ve not only failed to keep, but they don’t want to keep.
Essentially, you’ve put them to shame. And instead of acknowledging their shortcomings and that they should work on getting better, its much easier to attack and defend their egos. Especially if they’ve known you for a long time and you put in the work to improve so drastically that you’re no longer the person they used to like hanging out with.
The truth is, ladies and gentlemen, you are going to run into Christians who appear to be “holier than thou” because they probably put in more effort than you to 1) Draw close to God by reading his Word the Bible and 2) resisting the temptations of this world at a very great personal expense that often produces suffering, which in turns produces character, which in turn produces hope that doesn’t put them to shame. (Romans 5:3-5)
The strength by which true Christians stand in that faith, can come off as if they’re self-righteous or holier than thou. But I’d argue, that how you react to them says more about you than you think.
For instance, while it is true that the Bible encourages Christians to walk in grace and humility…have you noticed that the ones who tend to criticize Christians for acting too haughty are usually the same kind of Christians who live worldly lifestyles? The Christian Blogger with the BBL says she wants the ones who are “humble.” But is she? Does she come off as humble?
I’d say she’s the one who needs to humble herself, she and every other Christian who’s so put off by those who truly are striving to put God first. What do I mean?
Well…if you’re a high school basketball player who wants to get better to compete at a higher level, would you seek out elementary kids to play against? Or would you seek out those who are actually better than you?
If you want to get smarter. Hang around those who are smarter than you. If you want to get stronger, hang around those who are stronger. And if you want to be a better Christian and draw close to God, a good way to improve is hang around those who are doing just that. It’s the most constructive and beneficial peer pressure there is.
When I started boxing in 2017, because I wanted to get better, I humbled myself and took constructive criticism, not just from the Coaches, but there were teenagers and kids much younger than me giving me pointers on how to properly extend the jab, or to keep my feet distanced when I move. Furthermore, I studied and watched tapes of the greats. From Mike Tyson, to Lomachenko, and Canelo Alvarez. Each boxer excelled at something I wanted to improve on so I humbled myself to get better.
As I mentioned in my last post, a lot of Christians seem to think that if you don’t judge others, then that somehow absolves you from being judged yourself. As if God’s gonna see you, see that you never criticized or called anyone else out, and He’s going to be like, “Oh! Let her in. She never said a word when Becky was sleeping with six different guys in the same month. She didn’t judged, so I’m not going to judge her!”
The above meme is so appropriate, because the common response you’d get from people is, “Oh! I don’t mind being judged. But only by God. Not you humans! Only God can judge me …so there!“
Being judged/criticized by us humans…the most damage it’ll do is to your pride/ego and it’ll make you feel sad, offended, or ashamed. And if it’s a Christian who really loves you, then you should know that he’s not happy to do it.
We don’t want to lose you as a friend or a family member. But you have to understand, that our love for you as well as our faith in knowing what’s going to happen on Judgment Day, even if it means you never want to talk to us again, if what we said helps you to repent…that’s a heavy sacrifice I have to make.
Many aren’t. That’s why you have Christians going to pride events and gay weddings. They’ll tell themselves that they’re demonstrating love and support, to keep the doors open for your return to Christ. But really, I believe a lot of these Christians say nothing because they’re too afraid to hurt your feelings. They want you to be happy.
I’m afraid to hurt your feelings too. But if I end up cutting you as I reach out to pull you into this lifeboat, ladies and gents…it’s out of love. Love for you and love for Christ.
Matt 10:37 tells us, “Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.“
When you’re judged by God on Judgment Day…that’s it! It’s not just criticism, it’s the final sentence. There are no second chances. No time to repent. It’s over! You’re done! You’re either saved or you’re not. And make no mistake, Christ makes it clear that many will come saying “Lord Lord,” but he will say he never knew you. Only those who DO (action/demonstrates) the will of the father in heaven. (Matt 7:21-23)
Seriously…part of my passion when it comes to all this is my strong imagination. The 7th Day Adventist put together an amazing documentary about Noah and the Great Flood, I edited just the snippet below where it depicts God closing the door of the Ark and what happens when the flood comes. I encourage you to just take a moment and watch the whole thing…see if it doesn’t change your perspective or the urgency to repent.
Now, obviously there were a lot of creative liberties, but I fully back the video. The people had a chance to change. They saw Noah building the ark for well over a 100 years. But when God closed that door…ladies and gentlemen, that was it. No second chances.
It’s not difficult for me to imagine all my friends and family outside that ark. Men. Women. Children. The End Times are coming. The Great Tribulation. Famine. Plagues. Disasters. Last year, I had but a small sample of unbearable grief and heartache when a cousin I held as my sister was gunned down. She was just one person. I still have many who are close to my heart, and the though of them being destroyed…
That’s how I know I’m not self-righteous, though I continuously reflect on my motives. My hatred for this world stems from my love of the people ensnared by it. The passion and vitriol by which I write is because I believe in the Scriptures. I love you. I don’t want you to die for all eternity. I want you to be saved and I hate that Satan has his claws in so many of us, so I fight. I put on the sword and shield of Ephesians 6 and use the knowledge God has blessed me with to fight back.
Going back to the Christian who got her BBL, I suspect the real reason why she’s seeking the ones who are humble and not judgmental, is so she can continue coasting by on what she thinks she knows about God and the Bible, instead of learning more and risking finding out the truth, the truth being…that God may disapprove of what you’re doing and how you’re choosing to live.
I don’t say that to be demeaning…but if you’re worried about feeling small by those words, I say, embrace it. Forget what I’m saying, go straight to the Bible and allow yourself to feel small, like a child. Humble yourself! We’re not kings and queens. We are Christ’s followers. Servants. Christ washed the feet of all his disciples. Would you do the same for your friends?
“You’re always talking about being humble! So why do you act all high and mighty. Why do you act like you’re so much better than everyone else?!”
One, if by high and mighty…do you mean with confidence? Because while the Bible does talk about being meek and humble…I’d argue that when it comes to wickedness and this Satanic world, we must have the heart of lions to resist it. And if you stand with the world, thinking we should too, it makes sense why you’d see us as arrogant or all high and mighty.
Recall Daniel’s friends in Daniel Chapter 3, his friends Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego when they, along with all the people were commanded to fall down and worship a golden idol. Daniel’s friends refused to obey this command. Even at the risk of a fiery death in a furnace, they held their ground and maintained their faith.
In verse 16, they said, “O Nebuchadnezzar, we have no need to answer you in this matter. 17 If this be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of your hand, O king.”
Does that sound like your definition of humble? A demonstration of a Christian being humble comes in our faith and obedience to God and his word the Bible. An example of this is when the Bible tells wives to submit to their husband’s authority. Or for men to honor their wives in a self-sacrificing way the way Christ did for us. If you reject these scriptures because you don’t like them, are you really humble?
And my Second Point, is let’s say a Christian does act all high and mighty, why does it bother you so much?
I’ve already talked about my generation’s obsession with thinking we’re all the same so I’m not going to rehash that. I’m just going to be completely honest here.
My parents raised me to do my best. If I set out to write a book, I’m going all in. If I set out to work out and lose weight, I’m giving it my all. When I get married, it’s for life. And when I say Christ is my Lord and Savior, I really do see him as my king.
Now, before you get mad at me or anyone else for acting or thinking we’re better…have you ever truly put in the work, effort, and dedication to be good at something you set out to do? Because everything I’m good at, I worked at it. It took years to get this far and it wasn’t easy.
If it makes you feel better, I can tell you that I’m far from perfect and I battle my own lineup of demons every day. I’m surrounded by temptation and the passions and desires of my heart are strong. They say the hormones die down when you hit your 30s, but I’m just as hot-blooded as I was in my 20s.
Even when it comes my Christianity, I love it when I find people who are 10x spiritually stronger than myself. Last year, with the church group I joined, there was a woman named Ms. Teri who led some the most beautiful prayers I’ve ever heard. I used to wonder how people could pray “all day” the way you hear about in the past. But when I heard Ms. Teri pray, the way she prayed about others, praying for our specific hardships, thanking God for the specific blessings we revealed, and the love and joy she put into it…her prayers were long but I was never bored, nor did my mind start to wander off. It was amazing. I’ll never forget that.
Sometimes, I need these stronger Christians. I need their strength.
Last year, I went to Christ’s Memorial where I was surrounded by Jehovah’s Witnesses who all appeared holier than thou. I didn’t hate them. My reaction was almost equal to but opposite of Hannah Brown when she was called out about her sexual immorality.
What was my vice…my vice are dark violent thoughts. Psalms 11:5 tells us that “The Lord examines the righteous, but the wicked, those who love violence, he hates with a passion.”
I’m not sure if I “love” violence. I’m not a fan of gore. I don’t care about guns and explosions. And I’m the kind of guy who will swerve and risk an accident just to avoid running over a squirrel. All life is precious to me, none more so than humans, especially children, so I could never kill anyone unless it’s to protect someone I love.
However, hand to hand combat…ever since I was a kid, I’ve always just had a talent for it. I used to get bullied by both boys and girls until 2nd grade when I discovered martial arts. And man…I was just a natural at it. I didn’t have a teacher. I didn’t take classes. I could just see a move, and practice it until I got good. So, martial arts, boxing, hand to hand combat…in a bar fight, you’re going to want me on your side. Does that mean I’m a lover of violence? I don’t know.
But I do know the thoughts of revenge run strong in me. There’s a Marvel character named Sebastian Shaw who has the super power to absorb energy and transform it to raw strength.
That’s kind of how I am when it comes to my hatred and anger towards offenses and injustices I’ve had to bear. I have the strength and discipline to keep from acting out on my rage. But it’s there. And ever since I was 17, I’ve been able to convert these negative feelings into the fuel that drives me. I know that sounds cheesy, but this is a true event that happened to me during my junior year of high school.
Long-story-short, in the summer of 2003, I heard stories about how my father told courts I wasn’t his real son. I was dealing with a hatred for organized religion because one of my brothers was a hypocrite who was treated like the golden child while I was the black sheep. I was alone. No one to talk to. No one who understood. So when I started my junior year, I didn’t care about my future. I was ready to fail all my classes, because what’s the point.
That’s when my Drama Teacher took the time to read a letter I wrote, where I explained what happened that summer. She wrote me back and encouraged me to use all those negative things as motivations to graduate and get up out of my parents house.
Ever since then, it was like a switch was turned on in my brain. I used to think only you needed only positive energy and encouragement to do well like you see with those 90s TV families. There wasn’t a lot of that. Meanwhile, I was drowning in a sea of anger and animosity. And when that switch was made, I became a match and took flight. I haven’t stopped ever since.
And I tried. When I read the entire Bible by the time I was 30, I learned from Jesus’s example and finally learned to let go and forgive others. And I realized, I had been reliant on my anger for so long, getting by on the compliments and attaboys from people, it just doesn’t hit the same way. Not to mention, it doesn’t happen every day. For some reason the effects of “positive encouragement” is ephemeral, while an offense can burn for days if not, weeks.
And so…every injustice I see, every painful feeling I encounter, I just bottle that up and use it to stay driven and motivated. For those who still don’t get it, it’s like on days when you don’t feel like getting out of bed, when you don’t feel like hitting the gym, or going to work, or doing your very best…some men do it because they have mouths to feed. There’s a love for their wife and kids driving them to work hard and provide. But when you don’t have that, what else are you going to use?
Last year, after my beloved cousin was murdered, I learned that when she was alive, her baby daddy tried to strangle her. This baby daddy is a 32-year-old man who’s still living in Colorado Springs.
Here’s some horrible truth about me. Not only did I fantasize about beating this guy to an inch of his life almost every night when I hit the gym…I honestly saw him as a threat to another loved one, another cousin who’s like a baby sister to me. I wanted to eliminate that threat. It was strong.
So, when I attended Christ’s Memorial, surrounded by holier than thou Jehovah’s Witnesses…I had a breakdown where I started crying uncontrollably. I was so ashamed of all the hatred and rage that I’d been bottling up inside. I hadn’t forgiven him and that was wrong. I needed help. I needed Christians who were stronger. Holier than myself.
I got that help. The church group I met with last year was kind enough to listen and they poured their love into me. Such encouragement. Such friendship. I’ll never forget that. Weeks after I confessed all this to them, I started to get better. I prayed every day for God’s help and begged for the ability to forgive, and by May, when I went to Colorado for my cousin’s graduation…I no longer had a desire to kill this guy (though I’d be lying if i said i don’t want to break his arm. I’m still working on letting that go. I’m sorry. I’m ashamed).
My point is…finding Christians who may be “holier than thou” could be just the medicine you need to help get over sin/vice you’re struggling with.
Lastly, the woman’s line about wanting the ones who are “humble and know that a walk with God is not spotless” sounds like an innocuous statement. But really, she means she only wants the lukewarm Christians who’s cool and comfortable with breaking God’s commandments, the ones who aren’t too bothered by living sinful lifestyles because “hey! Who’s perfect? Am I right?!”
Influencers like the Lukewarm Christians who got the BBL, these are really dangerous people because it’s like they’re selling you a parachute to go skydiving, but the parachute is full of holes. You’re so enamored with the fun of free-falling thinking that, because you got a parachute, you’re guaranteed a safe landing. Don’t be deceived.
I love the “Only God can judge me” meme – that nails it!
I’m sure you have realized this, but your lifestyle of purity – which I greatly admire — will be viewed as a judgment to 97% of the population. Merely by existing you will make them feel judged, but you shouldn’t feel bad about that.
P.S. Thanks so much for your review of my book! That made my week.
Be blessed, my friend, and keep your ministry going!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks man! I’m so sorry, I don’t know why your comments keep going to my spam. 😦 lol, and you’re welcome with the review! Congrats on the accomplishment, I’m still in the middle of reading it but I didn’t want too much time to pass before I posted it. It really is great and inspirational. I admire your family for helping you. lol, and slick move staying back to help those freshmen move in! lololol
LikeLike
Thanks! And I just downloaded your book. I’ve been too tired to even read lately, but looking forward to it now that my energy is picking up a little. Cancer is back for the 6th time and getting ready to start an “inhibitor” treatment that won’t cure it but hopefully will stop it or slow it down.
Be blessed!
LikeLiked by 1 person
And LOL if only more of my schemes worked out as well as the freshmen move in thing!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Apologies if this posts twice . . . didn’t seem to take on the first try . . .
I love the “Only God can judge me” meme – that nails it!
I’m sure you have realized this, but your lifestyle of purity – which I greatly admire — will be viewed as a judgment to 97% of the population. Merely by existing you will make them feel judged, but you shouldn’t feel bad about that.
P.S. Thanks so much for your review of my book! That made my week.
Be blessed, my friend, and keep your ministry going!
LikeLiked by 1 person
P.S. And yes, we need Christians like you so that others can aspire to be holier. As my pastor often reminds us, while we are indeed still sinners, that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t strive for holiness.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Third try on my original comment. Hopefully I’m not littering your blog today!
I love the “Only God can judge me” meme – that nails it!
I’m sure you have realized this, but your lifestyle of purity – which I greatly admire — will be viewed as a judgment to 97% of the population. Merely by existing you will make them feel judged, but you shouldn’t feel bad about that.
P.S. Thanks so much for your review of my book! That made my week. Be blessed, my friend, and keep your ministry going!
LikeLike